ScreamQueenz: Where Horror Gets GAY!

MARK PATTON ravaged me. This show is the first of several dedicated to the movies I watched during the prep for or the recovery from) my colonoscopy. I'll be talking about the watery terrors of THE DROWNSMAN. Is it worth a watch? Or is it all wet? And then I'm off to the woods to spend the weekend with some slasher-iffic CRAZY BITCHES! (I hope I packed my Midol!) All this, plus a rendezvous with NOES2's MARK PATTON, a new kitty in the house, and lots of talk about my asshole. Really, what more could you want!

Time to set sail once again with my favorite mystery-solving queens, TRAE DEAN and DOUG SHAPIRO. This time, we join PETER USTINOV, BETTE DAVIS, MAGGIE SMITH and ANGELA LANSBURY as HERCULE POIROT tries to crack a bizarre on-board homicide in a land older than time in DEATH ON THE NILE. Another CONTEST is announced, I give a quickie review of EX MACHINA and all the deets on the first annual FLAME-CON! (Live cobra not included!)

I'm back from break, and I'm talking with ALLISON NOWACKI and BRYAN J. POLK from the I'M NOT HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS reality show podcast about SLASHERS, the movie about a Japanese game show with a big ol' body count. You will laugh. A lot. Also, the grieving process has brought out some rage. You'll find out the LGBT political issue that's got me all worked up as well as the AWFUL THING happened at the PODCAST AWARDS CEREMONY. Help out the show by buying SLASHERS through the special link below! Check out ALLISON and BRYAN at www.NotMakeFriends.com!

A trip to BLOOD BEACH ought to tide you over until the show resumes in Mid-May. This flashback recording of me guesting on the 42ND STREET DRIVE IN podcast also features SHAWN HUNT, CHRISTOPHER KAHLER and VAUGHN KUHLMEIER .

It's another mini-episode, because I felt it mandatory to warn you off of UNFRIENDED, a sorry excuse for Millenial horror barfed on us by the good folks at MTV.

Set sail for adventure, true romance and sexy rendezvous with the Son of Satan. I'm calling "All Aboard!" for the 1978 made for TV thriller CRUISE INTO TERROR. I'm joined once again by OWEN ROBERTSON and TOM SODERBERG to chronicle every bit of delicious camp and scenery-chewing mayhem in this campy classic. So, pack a swinsuit, your suntan lotion and your breathing mini-sarcophagus, because this ship is setting sail!

Another BONUS EPISODE!  Enjoy a SPOILER-FREE preview of GIRL HOUSE,  the sexy new slasher from the smokin' hot Canadian director, TREVOR MATTHEWS!

Its the magical time of year again: Time for me to release the next installment of the legendary FRIDAY THE 13th SPECTACULAR! We'll be covering the controversial ninth film in the series, JASON GOES TO HELL: The Final Friday. And while I may spend more time obsessing about LESLIE JORDAN in SORDID LIVES, the mysterious gunk in my drain, a menacing tower of shellfish and my cats testicles, you'll be sure to learn things about JGTH that you never dreamed. No, no...it still stinks, but I got some quips, insults and harsh barbs. Harsh Barb sounds like a character I want to play someday.  

Whatever you do...Never enter THE LAST HOUSE ON CEMETERY LANE! It's really boring in there.

This monster wants you so much, it will follow to the ends of the earth. It only wants to love you....to death. Special Guest: Joe Borrelli

Celebrate Valentine's Day with me as I give you a spoiler-free review of HONEYMOON! Is that wedding bells I'm hearing? Or is it a funeral dirge? Plus, find out how to win your very own DVD of HONEYMOON of your very own! Wow!

Join BRYAN WOLFARD and I as we check in to the very haunted Grand Island Hotel in BLOODY NEW YEAR. But beware of ugly shoes, tablecloth monsters and cheesy 80's music! Then it's off to chilly Tuscany to uncover the deadly secret of an ancient pond in NEVERLAKE.

In honor of the Victorian tradition of scary tales for the holiday season, for the Twelfth Night of Christmas I give to you a reading of one of my favorites.

It's back to the kitschy world of the MADE FOR TV HORROR MOVIES OF THE 1970's, and this holiday season my gift to you is SOMETHING EVIL. When SANDY DENNIS and her family move to rural Pennsylvania, they never suspected that they would be terrorized by demons, devils, pentacles, creepy cookbooks, perverted Pippin, swinging chickens, crying rats, screaming jars of goo, maniacal mobiles and possessed pottery! But nothing could prepare them for the deadliest horror of them all....the APPLE BAR SONG! Special Guest Hosts: OWEN ROBERTSON and THOM SODERBERG

In the Thanksgiving spirit of being grateful, I am joined by two very special guests: DAN KELLY from the BOYS, BEARS AND SCARES blog and JOHHNY KRUEG, host of KRUEGER NATION. We are gathered here today to celebrate one of my favorite turkeys: MICHEAL CRICHTON's science fiction thriller LOOKER (1981) starring ALBERT FINNEY and LAURIE PARTRIDGE....er, SUSAN DEY. Plus, spoiler free quickie reviews of WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO SOLANGE?, UNDER THE SKIN, THE DAMNED and THE TAKING OF DEBORAH LOGAN. Gobble, gobble! Visit Dan at www.BoysBearsandScares.com and listen to Johnny at www.KruegerNation.com.