The Art of Charm

You chose your partners for a reason. "The bottom line for great relationships is you have to know how to deal with differences." -Harville Hendrix The Cheat Sheet: What is zero negativity and how do you use it in a relationship? Imago: what is it and why should you bother to care? Only 10% of the married population is in a healthy, happy marriage: true or false? Why arranged marriages have historically worked better than love matches. What roles do safety and curiosity play in a healthy relationship? And so much more... Have you ever wondered why you choose the partners you chose in relationships? Or why so many people seem to fall in love, only to be miserable with each other down the road? Harville Hendrix joins us today to answer these questions, and the psychology behind why relationships work or don't work out. Harville is a relationship expert, therapist, coach and author of several books including Getting The Love You Want. He joins us to chat about all of this and much more on episode 362 of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: For over 35 years Harville Hendrix has worked in the field of relationships. In that time he and his wife Helen have worked with countless couples on how to communicate better and stay connected. In that time they've found what works and what doesn't work to maintain a healthy, happy relationship. Harville says in order to understand why some connections last and others don't, we need to first understand why we are drawn to the people we are drawn to. Doing so will help us work within our relationships so we're actually getting the love we want. When we're infants we create an image of our caretakers and we're left with an imprint that tells what needs were met, and what needs were not. We create what's called an "imago" when we do this. This becomes our basis for what we seek in a partner. In other words if we had a need that wasn't met by our caretakers (and most of us had some need or many needs), then we actively look for that fulfillment from someone just like our caretaker. At first that might sound illogical (why not just seek someone who can give us what we didn't get and not a replica of the person who didn't give it to us in the first place?), but Harville says we do this so we can create growth for ourselves with that person. And we attract someone who needs something we can't fulfill for them, so we can create a growth opportunity for them in return. But what typically happens is we fall in romantic love, the love blooms and our visions are colored by dopamine and endorphins so we think everything is rosy and perfect. Til one day the dopamine wears off and we see the other person as they truly are. And then we get frustrated that they aren't meeting our unmet needs and they get defensive when we try to talk about these needs, because we don't know how to effectively communicate without triggering the other person. So instead of effectively working on these difficulties, most people either give up and break off the relationship or end the marriage. In most cases we do this because we haven't learned how to talk to each other in a way that creates a safe space for the other person. We try to ask for what we need, but take a position of authority and a defensive tone that simply leads to our partner becoming defensive in return. To rectify this and to create a safe relationship to thrive in, Harville has a few suggestions. And these are suggestions he has witnessed work for countless couples, it's the basis for his practice, his books and his programs. There are three things we need to do to create a safe relationship where both people can discuss their needs. The first is to learn how to talk. Instead of our usual monologue, which is how most people speak, we need to have a dialogue. And in this dialogue we need to respect our partner's differences and points of view; they should be mirrored, validated, listened to and empathized with. We can also set aside specific time to discuss relationship topics and instead of asking "are you done?", always ask your partner "is there more?". The second thing we can do is to have a zero negativity process. In a zero negativity relationship all conversations you have you affirm your partner as different with the right to their opinions. You don't make them bad because they are different or devalue them because of those differences. This helps create a safe environment where differences can be expressed from both of you. Thirdly affirm each other on a daily basis. Harville and his wife Helen say three things about each other that they appreciate every day. And these are things that happened that day. It's an affirmation process or a gratitude practice for your relationship. This actually helps your brain create new neural pathways and you'll see your partner in a new light. Your partner becomes a source of gratitude, happiness and joy for you instead of a sore spot. There's a plethora of additional relationship and marriage tools and advice in this episode with Harville. He was a terrific guest to have on who shared SO much information, get ready for it when you listen! Thanks for being here Harville, and special thanks to all of you for listening. We'll see you next time on The Art of Charm. THANKS HARVILLE HENDRIX! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let Harville know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Harville on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Harville Hendrix's web siteHarville Hendrix on TwitterGetting The Love You Want, by Harville Hendrix You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

Create a plan and work backwards. "Most of us are gambling on the biggest risk of all: that one day we can buy the freedom to do what we want later in life."-Jake Ducey The Cheat Sheet: What percentage of people are actively disengaged from their work? Career capital: what is it and why should you be creating it? Jake failed an English class in college: true or false? Why did he retype The Great Gatsby? What is the 10 minute rule and how do you apply it? And so much more... If you met someone who had dropped out of college and written a book at age 19, would you think they knew enough for the book to be any good or would you dismiss them? Not only did our guest for today's show write and publish a book at 19, he published his second book by the ripe old age of 23. That guest is Jake Ducey and that second book is The Purpose Principles. He joins us to talk about finding your purpose, taking action and productivity. We discuss those topics and so much more on this episode of The Art of Charm. Click Here to Support The Show and get 10% off Onnit! More About This Show: Jake Ducey was like most of us: he was raised to believe the road to success meant graduating high school with good grades, going to college and then getting a good job until you retired. And then maybe when you retired you'd have enough money and enough time to really do the things you love to do. But not long into his college career Jake ditched that notion. He realized he didn't want to be another cog in the wheel, and that's all that college was preparing him to be. After reading a copy of Jack Canfield's The Success Principles, he was inspired to quit school and strike out on his own. By age 19 he had written his first book and was turned down by a myriad of publishers. They all told him he couldn't possibly know enough to write a good book and they passed on his work. So he took matters into his own hands and self-published and self-promoted. He was his only publicist and he had no marketing budget to speak of, but he launched his book into Amazon's top 300. By the time his second book was ready he was offered a book deal, becoming the youngest motivational author at his publishing company. Along the way he's gathered the stories of our modern day successes like Oprah, Brad Pitt, Jim Carey and The Beatles. He's been mentored and learned under the tutelage of great authors like Jack Canfield and John Gray. He's taken valuable lessons he's learned from them and passed along that knowledge to the public. And today he passes along much of that knowledge to us. We touch on several topics in this episode, one of those being how to take action despite fear. He says men like John Gray and Jack Canfield are afraid too, they just don't let it stop them. They take action and have courage, inspite of their fear. Also it's important to understand you'll never get rid of fear, none of us will, so we have to move forward even when we feel it. Fear is a natural part of being alive, but we can face it and move ahead even when it's present. Jake also says he's learned to ask himself one simple question in any scenario when he's afraid: "What's the best that could happen?". Rather than focusing on the worst, which is what most of us do, he focuses on the best. And if you really need to address that worst case scenario, Jake recommends addressing it, preparing for it and then focusing on the best possible outcome and hoping for that. There are several other lessons he provides on today's episode but the final one we'll cover here is his productivity. How in the world can someone so young accomplish so much? He falls back on lessons from other motivational authors and uses the 10-minute rule and the 5 tasks a day rule. Take your To-Do list and find the items that will take you 10 (or 15) minutes to do and separate them from the others. And every day focus on 5 things you will do today to move you towards the life you really want. Jake and I also talk about how to lock down your purpose, how to create your most successful and fulfilling year (the one question to ask for this) and a whole heckuva lot more! Thanks to Jake for joining us and sharing his inspirational story and insightful knowledge. As always, thank you for being here and we'll see you next time. THANKS JAKE DUCEY! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let Jake know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Jake on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Jake Ducey's web siteThe Purpose Principles, by Jake DuceyJake Ducey on Twitter You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox-Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

As Marsha Shandur (@yesyesmarsha) knows, networking can be fun. Here's where she shows you how. "Networking is a long-term relationship, not a one-night stand." -Marsha Shandur The Cheat Sheet: Is everyone afraid of networking events? The top two ways to add value to someone no matter who they are. What's the spotlight effect? What does Helen Fielding have to teach us about networking? What is Marsha's "secret sentence" she uses to get a response from people? And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/marsha-shandur-saying-yes-networking-episode-359/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

You are the common denominator. "We gain strength, courage and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face and we do the thing we cannot do." -Eleanor Roosevelt The Cheat Sheet: Why is everyone afraid of accountability? What two qualities do leaders possess? Why lack of accountability in an office punishes the best employees. Why your ego doesn't help you. Fault vs. responsibility: Linda explains the differences. And so much more... Accountability. It's something we all want, yet most of us fear. We want it because with accountability things are clear, projects run smoother, results are produced and people are more fulfilled. In relationships the same is true: we're happier with accountability because our expectations are clear and are being met. So why do we fear it? And what can we shift in our mindset, our behaviors and our attitudes to let go of that fear and embrace accountability? Linda Galindo of The Straight Truth joins us to answer those questions and more on the 357th edition of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: Have you ever worked in an office where there was someone who obviously didn't pull his or her weight and yet they were allowed to get away with it? Our guest for today's episode explains why this experience is so common and so frustrating, and what you can do about it if you find yourself picking up someone else's slack in your office. It boils down to accountability and if someone isn't living up to what is expected of him or her in their work, and no one holds them accountable then everyone involved suffers. It's common in the workforce today, but becoming less and less accepted. And if you're on the receiving end of this person's workload, Linda says there is something you can do about it besides just obediently and grudgingly take on the extra work. Here's the type of conversation she says to have with your boss if or when this happens: express your concern and let your boss know you want to do more interesting work. Assure them they can rely on you to do this new, interesting work and tell them you want to stretch yourself in your role. And let your boss know by giving you this type of work, they'll also have time to deal with the other person. Linda has spoken with many leaders of organizations and all have agreed this type of communication is invaluable to them. By saying this you are letting them know you want to be a leader for them, they can count on you and you are willing to express your thoughts; all valuable traits they are looking for in a leader within the company. There are a few other behaviors leaders look for from their employees in terms of accountability. If you want to be a leader, don't talk about others when they aren't around. Instead talk to someone if you have a concern and address it directly with them. No one trusts someone who talks about others behind their back. If you talk about one person behind his or her back, what's to stop you from talking about anyone else when they aren't around? Leaders must be trusted. Addressing someone directly builds trust. The second behavior is to not have meetings after the meeting! If something isn't clear to you during the meeting than be bold, courageous and brave and say so. You are responsible and accountable for your own clarity, so if something isn't clear to you than say so in that moment. Accountability isn't just reserved for the workplace. Accountability is a necessary component of healthy, long-lasting relationships too. In order for a relationship to be truly fulfilling and strong for the long haul, each person in it must take 100% accountability for the relationship. You read that right: 100%, not 50%. Linda says if it's 50% then it devolves into a co-dependent, needy relationship. So if you and your significant other want it to work out take 100% responsibility for the relationship and your part in it. Linda and I also talk about the power of having someone in your life holding you accountable for your accountability and your results. She stresses the importance of having a coach or someone else in your life who is completely committed to your success and allowing that person to hold your feet to the fire. That person could be a coach or a friend, but not a significant other (Linda explains why not). We also talk about steps to take right now to change your relationship to accountability, and how to develop accountability behaviors at work, among other related topics. Linda really brought the straight truth on accountability in this episode, so be sure to hear all the details! Thanks to Linda for being here, and thanks to all of you for tuning in. We'll see you next time on The Art of Charm. THANKS LINDA GALINDO! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let Linda know by clicking on the link below and sending her a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Linda on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Linda Galindo's web siteLinda Galindo on TwitterThe 85% Solution, by Linda Galindo You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

Adventure is good for everyone. "The biggest risk is getting to the end of your life and looking back and thinking 'Man I could have done more.'" -Dave Cornthwaite The Cheat Sheet: What training does he do for his adventures? This kills ambition more than anything else, what is it? How many hours a day are most employees productive? How to deal with naysayers. When was the last time he had his own home? And so much more... Can you imagine skateboarding the length of Great Britain? Now what if you had just recently picked up a longboard for the first time? That's exactly what today's guest did, and he broke the world record doing so. Today Dave Cornthwaite joins us to talk about his adventures, including Expedition 1,000, and how he became a traveler, author, filmmaker and speaker on the subject of adventure travel. All of that and more on the 356th edition of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: Dave wasn't born into a life of adventure, he cultivated it. On his 25th birthday he woke up feeling completely disenchanted with his life. He had a great job earning a good living, had a lovely home, a significant other and a cat. In other words, everyone would think he had the ideal life. But in his heart he knew he only loved his cat, and that cat was about to have a much better day than he was. That was Dave's turning point. Soon he quit his job and decided he was going to skate around Australia, breaking the world record in the process. To prepare he simply skateboarded every day for a couple of weeks and then he wheeled his way across the length of Great Britain, thereby setting his first world record. He didn't know how he was going to do either of these objectives when he set out to do them, he simply decided he was going to do them. He trained, learned and sorted things out as he went along. And he hasn't looked back since. Within those first two years of leaving his job, he broke several world records, landed a book deal and skated the length of both Great Britain and Australia. He's also in the midst of Expedition 1000: 25 journeys of 1000 miles or more using non-motorized transport. Not bad for a guy who had been living a pretty "normal" life until then! So how did he make that shift and how did he know to do so? Dave says there were signs of course, but most important he knew to follow his gut. His instinct told him something wasn't right, and there was more available to life than just going to a job, collecting a paycheck and accumulating "stuff". In addition to his gut telling him to search for more, he recalls not wanting to go to work on Monday. He also spent money on useless things, as a way to fit in and a way to fill the void that was creeping in from lack of happiness in his overall life. Those were his big clues, along with what his gut told him. If you find yourself in that same boat, and you know what you want to do next but you've got some fear, how do you get up the gumption to do it? Dave says things are far scarier in your mind and your thoughts, than they are in real life. So stop thinking so much and go do the things you need to do. And don't be bothered by the naysayers who try to stop you. Dave has heard his fair share of these folks, and even still hears from some of them today. What he's learned is when people are trying to dissuade you or they are speaking to your fears, it's not actually your fears they are speaking to but their own fears. When someone tries to talk you out of your big goal or dream just know it's their own fear they're trying to assuage. His final bit of wisdom on the subject is to remember it takes tremendous courage even to vocalize your dreams, so if your friends aren't supportive of you and encouraging you then they aren't real friends. There's tons more wisdom shared in this episode with Dave, tune in to hear his thoughts on how to say yes more, and have more opportunities show up in your life along with why we all need a bit of adventure in your lives. He has an adventurous spirit and it was terrific to hear where he's been and what he's learned from his last decade of adventure. Big thanks to Dave for joining the show, and special thanks to you for listening. We'll see you next time on The Art of Charm. THANKS DAVE CORNTHWAITE! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let Dave know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Dave on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Dave Cornthwaite's web siteDave Cornthwaite on TwitterExpedition 1,000 on Facebook You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

Focus on what works, not what doesn't. "Somebody busier than you is running right now." -MJ Shaar The Cheat Sheet: Why being busy is just a way of showing self-importance. What is the confirmation bias? The truth about why sleeping poorly leads to poor eating choices. The biochemicals that help us function properly, how to get enough of them. Why making minor shifts versus a major overhaul is a much sounder strategy for success. And so much more... Sleep, mood, food and exercise are the four pillars of health. And while some experts focus on one or two of these our guest for episode 355 focuses on all four. MJ Shaar, author of Smarts and Stamina, is a health and wellness expert who holds a Master of Applied Positive Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania. She's also a certified personal trainer and consultant in this field. On today's episode we talk about these four pillars, what her book has to say on them and recommendations she has to get smarter and build more stamina easier and faster. All of that and more on this edition of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: If you were committed to improving your health by changing your sleep patterns, your mood, your food habits or your exercise routine, where would you start? Would you focus on the ones that need the most improvement, or would you improve on good habits you've already created in one (or more) of those four areas? Most of us would want to shift our bad habits and make them better, but our guest today says we're better off improving the good things we're already doing. If we're good at getting enough sleep then what can we do to be even better in this area? If we're already exercising regularly what else can we do to improve? By spending our energy and our time enhancing our existing good habits, MJ says we're far more likely to naturally and more easily improve upon our bad ones too. Over the last 14 years MJ has researched, studied and explored those four pillars of health, and she's even created a business model for other health professionals to become trained and certified in. Her Smarts and Stamina program is designed to help people become happier, more productive and healthier in every way, and to do so with as little self-discipline needed as possible! On today's episode we discuss each of the four areas (sleep, mood, food and exercise) and some of the science behind the important role each plays in our overall well-being. One of the areas we spend a lot of time on is sleep. She often hears people say they are too busy to get more than a few hours rest. And while some may hear that and think the person must be very busy, MJ hears that and thinks the person's cognitive abilities are impaired and their judgment is skewed...because that's what happens from regular sleep deprivation. Even if you aren't that sleep deprived person, you may miss a few hours here and there. And that's ok according to MJ. She says our bodies will try and make up for it down the road, we may want to sleep an extra hour or two on the weekend or catch a nap in the afternoon. But if we continue to deprive our bodies of the sleep they need over a long period of time it's just bad news all around. She compares sleep to a line of credit. If you take out a line of credit (or you miss a few hours of sleep), you can easily repay it a little bit at a time as long as you do so regularly and consistently. You can rebuild your sleep health by adding on a few more hours over time. But if you miss a few payments or take out even more money (or you continually deprive yourself of sleep for weeks, months on end) then you're simply digging yourself an even bigger hole that's much harder to get out of. When you miss some sleep, grab extra winks as soon as you can and don't make it a regular habit. To help you sleep soundly, regularly MJ has a few suggestions she shares in this episode. The first thing she says is to add in a few moments throughout your day to decompress. If you're in the checkout line at the store, just take a couple of deep breaths and be in the checkout line. You don't need to check Twitter or your email, just breath. Instead of driving to lunch, walk there instead. Allow yourself a few moments throughout your day to slow down a little, you'll have a much easier time slowing down to go to sleep at night. And secondly, create a ritual before bed. Remember how your parents tucked you in at night when you were a kid? You brushed your teeth, washed your face, maybe they read you a story and then it was lights out for the night. You can do the same thing for yourself now: brush your teeth, wash your face, get into bed and read for 10 minutes before turning out the lights. If you do this regularly your brain will catch on and will understand doing those things means you're going to sleep, it will start to sync up with that ritual and will cue your body to get ready to sleep. Those are just a few of the suggestions MJ shares in this episode, she has plenty of wit and wisdom you'll want to tune in for. A big thanks to her for being here, and thanks to you too. Thanks so much and we'll see you next time on The Art of Charm. THANKS MJ SHAAR! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let MJ know by clicking on the link below and sending her a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank MJ on Twitter! Resources from this episode: MJ Shaar's web siteMJ Shaar on TwitterSmarts and Stamina, MJ Shaar's book You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

Why financial advisors are not always in your corner. "Learn to master money, and not let money master you." -Andrew Hallam The Cheat Sheet: How much would the average US stock from 20 years ago have earned you today? How $6.45 a day can get you a million dollars in 39 years. Why budgeting doesn't work, and what to do instead. Auto loans: why they're a bad idea. Who is Saint Jack and why should you care? And so much more... Nearly anyone in any industry or profession, with proper education, planning and execution can become a millionaire: true or false? True according to our guest for episode 354. Today Andrew Hallam, former finance teacher and author of Millionaire Teacher joins us to talk about the secret to compound interest, how to wisely invest, how to dig yourself out of debt and a host of other finance-related topics. Listen in for all of that and so much more on the 354th edition of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: Very often people believe unless they are making millions of dollars there's no way they can become a millionaire. How could a teacher or a mechanic ever reach millionaire status? By saving and investing wisely and consistently over time, according to Andrew Hallam. And Andrew would know: he taught personal finance to the children of some of the world's most high-octane, Type A business parents. He also wrote the Amazon top-ranked book, Millionaire Teacher. He didn't start out with such lofty upbringing though; he has blue collar roots and earned his way through college, the first of his family to do so. While he was working one summer he met a mechanic who was a millionaire and that man taught him to learn to master money and not the other way around. One of Andrew's keys to mastering money has been understanding the beauty of compound interest. Andrew learned to invest a small amount every month at a young age, and to do so consistently over time while watching that money grow, and grow and grow. On today's show he explains how investing as little as $6.45 a day can become a million dollars over the course of 9 years, he goes into detail on how compound interest makes this possible and how we can start doing this today. But what if you're like millions of people who have credit card debt? Should you still invest while paying off your balance? Not according to Adam. Instead of investing, where you're getting a 9% return on your investment, pay off your credit cards because the average card is charging 18% interest. So take the money you were going to invest and pay down your credit cards. And here's a trick to paying them off even faster: write out exactly how much you owe on a slip of paper and then write the date by which you'll have them all paid off. Take that piece of paper and post it somewhere you'll see it every day, like your bathroom mirror. Look at it and remember you're on your way to mastering your money, and not letting your money master you. Once you're on your way to having paid off your credit cards and you're ready to invest for your future, set up an automatic transfer to your 401(k) or to a separate account which you use only to invest for retirement. And if your company offers to match your 401(k) investment make sure you take advantage of it. On the subject of where to invest, Andrew also has a suggestion: try the Vanguard Index. This particular index is set up by a company called The Vanguard Group, and the index is structured in such a way that you don't pay a sales commission. That means there are no fat cats and no shareholders who are making extra bucks off of you, as is the case with so many other financial packages and financial advisors. If you want to try another option, you can go with Fidelity's Index funds as well. But in most other instances he says the banker or financial advisor who is supposed to be helping you will really be concerned with making money for themselves and their employer first and foremost. On this episode Andrew also explains which assets are appreciating (and worth taking loans out for) and which are depreciating, and why auto loans are such a bad idea. He gives us plenty of actionable suggestions to get us started on the road to financial freedom, so have a listen and make a move after you do! Let's thank Andrew for sharing his wealth of knowledge (pun intended) and for sharing his time so generously. And thank you for being here, having you listen in is always appreciated. We'll see you next time on The Art of Charm. THANKS ANDREW HALLAM! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let John know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Andrew on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Andrew Hallam's web siteAndrew Hallam on TwitterMillionaire Teacher, Andrew Hallam's book You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

Language hacks aren't just for languages. "Vulnerability is the best way to show strength, and vulnerability and respect go hand in hand."-The Art of Charm The Cheat Sheet: How he condensed four years of MIT curriculum into 12 months. The new learning paradigm: Scott explains. When is it most important to speak with natives of a language you're learning? The two things employers look for when hiring: what are they? How to get anyone to open up and let you in. And so much more... There's a skill to learning a new language and we've discussed this topic in-depth on several other shows here, but is there anything about the act and art of learning a language that can be applied to other aspects of our lives? If we don't care about learning other languages is there still value in some of the hacks people apply when becoming multi-linguistic? Absolutely, according to Scott H Young our guest for today's show. Scott invests his days in learning how to do things more efficiently and effectively, including languages. Today he shares with us how to apply his language hacks for everyday life, and so much more on the 353rd episode of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: Would you ever go to a country with the vow not speak English no matter what? Not only did Scott H Young do that, he went to FOUR countries without speaking English while traveling with a friend. As you might imagine, he learned a great deal along the way and much of what he learned had little to do with language itself. On today's show we talk about how to apply language hacks to everyday life, based on what he discovered in his pursuit of being multi-lingual. The first discovery he shares is why we'd even bother, why does it matter if we learn how to navigate differences in other people? Because all of us, even if we never travel to a foreign country, will interact or be exposed to people who are different than we are. They either live differently, think differently or run with a different crowd. And the key to a healthier, happier and more productive life is to get along with people from all walks of life no matter how different they are from us. It's one of the most important traits employers look for in a potential new hire: will he or she fit into this culture? A great way to prove you will is to show you've assimilated or connected with people from many different backgrounds. The fundamental way to connect, according to Scott, is to find something you respect about that culture and focus on that. Once people in that culture understand you respect why they do what they do, even if it is different from the why and how of your background, the more open and receptive they will become. Once someone is open and receptive, it's far easier to connect and build a mutually satisfying relationship where you learn and express yourselves with each other. This doesn't have to apply to someone from a foreign country or with a different nationality, this can be applied to the various social groups you encounter. Are you a professor who has to sit down with a group of hipsters? The best way to fit in is to find something about them you respect, then look for how they operate, communicate and how they become friends. When you find all of that you'll have a much easier time connecting and fitting into their group. Or maybe you live in a particular neighborhood and don't "get" the way people live just a few miles from you. Be willing to explore, and look for ways to understand why they do what they do. When you look for and find the "whys" of a culture, any culture, you're far more likely to accept and appreciate that group. We also discuss why respecting someone from a different background doesn't mean we're any less confident in who we are, it isn't showing weakness to show respect for others. This is where vulnerability plays a key role. In essence vulnerability is showing the other person you respect them enough to open, and let your guard down. That gives them the opportunity to do so and allows for a much more real connection. Scott and I dive into this topic even deeper in the show. It was a pleasure to have Scott here to chat about his experiences and the lessons he's learned, and how you can apply his wisdom to get ahead! Thank you for being here, and listening in. We'll see you next time. THANKS SCOTT H YOUNG! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let Scott know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Scott on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Scott H Young's web siteScott H Young on TwitterScott's videos on language hacks You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

Create your own influential network. "Just start something. Test something out, let it fail and let it fail often."-Jon Levy The Cheat Sheet: The statistical impact your friendships have on you. What are the two types of epidemics? The ninja strategy for following up by email. How to invite people from all backgrounds and walks of life. Why people like you even more if you ask them for a favor.. And so much more... What would it be like to have an Olympic athlete, an Oscar-winning actor and a CEO of a billion-dollar company at your dining room table? How could you create an event to bring them together and make them want to share a meal with you? Our guest for episode 351 did just that. Jon Levy runs an event called The Influencers Dinner in his home in New York. On today's episode he shares the origins of his idea, how he executed it to become the successful experience it is and how you can apply the same principles to create a similar event of your own. Join us for all of that and more on episode 351 of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: Jon Levy is a behavior expert, digital strategist and keynote speaker, but what is probably best known for is dinner. If you're lucky enough to get an invite to one of his exclusive dinners you're bound to have an amazing time with some of the most influential people in the world. He's had members of royal families attend, Nobel Laureates, famous actors, musicians, artists and some of the top leaders in every industry from around the globe. So what's his secret? Did he have an amazing Rolodex and just decided to gather people together at his place? Not at all. About six years ago he attended a seminar with Landmark Education and something the seminar leader said struck a chord within him. The leader said the quality of our lives is largely determined by the people we spend our time with and the conversations we have. These two things are the fundamental elements that impact who we are and where we go with our lives. Jon realized he wanted to connect with the greatest influencers he could, but how? At the time he was 28 and working for a start-up, he wasn't anyone who could get a phone call (much less a dinner) with the heads of state or Olympic medal winners. He spent the next year ruminating over how to create so much value for these people that they would make time in their already hectic schedules. He knew whatever he created needed to be so novel they would say yes. He eventually thought of having people over for dinner. He knew a group activity like cooking together would bond them quickly, and sharing food and conversation would cement that bond. Here's the novel part of the event: no one knows each other and each person is a leader from a different industry. They are not allowed to talk about what they do, they can only use their first names and if they are famous they must assume a different first name. Then over dinner the guests will guess what each of the attendees does for a living, only then can the guest reveal who they are! Since his first dinner Jon has since held 36 more and The Influencers Dinner has grown to be legendary. It's been featured in Forbes, The New York-Times and has been the catalyst behind millions of dollars done in business deals, publicity and press coverage for the attendees, multiple non-profits and even some romantic relationships. But Jon is the first to admit he overcame many hurdles and made plenty of mistakes along the way. He says he has embarrassed himself more times than not, failed countless times and had to learn many lessons the hard way. But it's all been worth it. In his words, "it takes a long time to become an overnight success". If you're in the same position Jon was when he first had the idea, what are some practical steps you can take to get going and create your own variation of The Influencers Dinner? Jon's first suggestion is to create novelty. Find something unique you can offer your guests that no one else does. Do you love games? Then do a game night and spend some time sorting out how to structure the evening so your guests enjoy themselves and you add value to their lives. That's another key point Jon makes: be sure you do something that is true to your core values. Remember this is going to be an event you're hosting for years to come so make it fun, make it enjoyable and make it something you already like doing. If it's not games, then how about a wine tasting or a mixology night? Again put some thought into this and be sure the event and activity you are hosting is true to you. One last suggestion Jon has is to spend a lot of time coming up with the idea. It took him a full year to come up with the dinner party idea! And he cautions about following in his footsteps with the dinner party: they get expensive (he spent $30k on his last year alone) so consider other alternatives before going down that road, unless you're willing to fork out the money. Jon recommends giving your idea a lot of consideration, there are plenty of other viable and equally fun alternatives to a dinner party. Jon also discusses some of the basic etiquette he follows in inviting people and for the event itself, suggestions you'll want to bear in mind as you create your own version of The Influencers Dinner. This is a fascinating topic so be sure to listen in and get all the golden nuggets! Thank you for listening and we'll see you next time. THANKS JON LEVY! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let Jon know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Jon on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Jon Levy's web siteThe Forbes article on Jon's dinnersJon Levy on Twitter John Corcoran on The AOCAdam Grant on The AOC You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

Steve Sisler (@stevesisler) explains how to adjust your style to connect. "We don't see people as they are, we see people as we are."-Steve Sisler The Cheat Sheet: The three reasons people listen. How much of communication is verbal, how much body language? What behavioral profile do nurses most often fit? Why meek does not equal weak. The secret to saying anything to anyone, Steve reveals. And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/steve-sisler-read-people-episode-350/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

Sometimes, it takes courage to quit. "If you want to be you have to do."-John Lee Dumas The Cheat Sheet: What was his first real train wreck in his life? Why quitting isn't just for quitters. Is luck part of the success equation according to John? How much of a runway did he give himself when he started his podcast? The impostor syndrome: what it is and how it almost crushed John. And so much more... Do you think it takes courage to quit something, or do you believe quitting is never justified? One of the most successful podcasters in the world had to quit time after time after time in order to achieve the level of success he has today. John Lee Dumas, the mastermind behind Entrepreneur on Fire and Podcaster's Paradise, joins us to talk about how he found the courage to quit throughout his 20s and the success that brought him in his 30s. Listen in for all of that and so much more on episode 349 of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: We live in a culture that glorifies 18-hour workdays, even if you're in a job or running a business you hate. There is no room at the top for quitters, that's long been the motto held by many. But is any of that really true or is it ok for you to quit until you find your thing? Turning the "quitting is only for quitters" paradigm on its head is our guest for episode 349, Mr. John Lee Dumas. If this is the only podcast you listen to then you may not have heard of him. But if you know anything about the podcasting world you know this guy is a phenom. He's the ringleader of Entrepreneur on Fire (or EOFire for short), a daily podcast getting millions of downloads and today earning him a seven-figure income. But just a few short years ago, John was struggling...really struggling. He had given up on law school after one semester, quit the corporate finance world after a few short years, and ended a brief run in commercial real estate. And John did not come from a family of quitters, he was not raised to quit anything. He was raised to give it his all and to know he'd succeed. All of the "quitting" began after John spent four years in the Army. He went to college on an Army ROTC scholarship, part of which required him to serve for four years after. When he originally signed on the dotted line in the late 90s we were a country at peace. And then 9/11 happened. The day the US was attacked was the beginning of John's senior year of college. He was concerned, of course everyone was at the time, but it wasn't until January of the following year that he understood he'd be going into a full conflict combat zone in Iraq. He was an Army tank leader and lead 16 men on a tour there through some of the bloodiest battles in that war. Losing four of his men really shifted John's perspective. He promised himself his life would make a difference and he would fulfill on promises these men would never have the chance to. He vowed to never settle for less than what he thought he was capable of. That vow and that promise were the reasons John explored and quit so many avenues after finishing in the armed forces. He left law school after one semester, even though he knew on his first day that it wasn't for him. He tried several other career paths, but nothing was "it" and he knew it. But one day while driving to work he ran out of podcasts to listen to. At the time he was in commercial real estate and was traveling a lot so while in his car he listened to inspirational and educational podcasts. And then it hit him: he would create and produce a daily podcast! No one else was so why not him? Feeling like he had found "it", John went full speed ahead into podcasting creation mode. From there EOFire was born. That's not to say it was all sunshine and roses, not even close. Because he had no college debt, John lived prudently and had saved over $100k. He used that money as his runway, and he needed it. EOFire didn't make any money for the first nine months. But he stuck it out, he honed his craft and continued (and still continues) to learn along the way. As he got better his numbers got bigger and his reach grew. With that advertisers came calling and opportunities presented themselves, like his mastermind group Podcaster's Paradise. Today he runs a thriving podcast that garners millions of downloads and is set to earn him well into the seven figure mark in 2015. And his lesson from all of this? Quit until you make it! We talk about so much on this episode, including how to know when to quit, how to know if your side project can be a full-on business and how to find a great mentor and mastermind group. John wanted to thank all of you for listening so he's given you the gift of his Podcast Launch book, for free right here. You don't even have to give your email address, it's completely free. John and I both thank you for being here, and we'll see you next time. THANKS JOHN LEE DUMAS! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let John know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank John on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Entrepreneur on FireJohn Lee Dumas on TwitterPodcast Launch, John Lee Dumas' book - free for you!   You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)!  HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there.   FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING.  Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

Be a boss and automate your savings. "Money amplifies our true self."-Mike Michalowicz The Cheat Sheet: What is Parkinson's Theory? ____ makes us lazy, Mike fills in the blank. Money has now become a mechanism for what? What is The Wedge and how do you apply it for a better life? How to and why to start saving money, no matter how much or how little you make. And so much more... Do you always tell yourself you'll save more when you make more money? Or maybe you did say that in the past but now you actually make more and still don't feel like you have enough to start saving. Here with solutions to both situations is the author of several books including Profit First, Mr. Mike Michalowicz. Mike has written extensively about profits, making money and entrepreneurship. But even if you don't have a business or you don't consider yourself an entrepreneur, this show is for you. Today we talk about putting profit first and expenses second, whatever your financial situation. Listen in for all of that and so much more on episode 348 of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: By the time he was 35 Mike Michalowicz was a millionaire. He had sold his second business for mucho dinero and he was awfully proud of himself. Too proud in fact, something he readily admits caused his next missteps. After finding himself with boatloads of cash he decided to be an angel investor. He thought that's what everyone does after they make a million - they invest in other businesses, show those businesses how to make millions and then earn billions as a result of their investment. That was his plan, and it completely backfired. He didn't use common sense regarding the companies he chose and he paid the price for it. He paid the FULL price for it. Between his bad investments and his need to flash his money around with expensive cars, toys, etc, he lost all of his earnings. So after a "Come to Jesus" moment, he went back to the drawing board of entrepreneurship with a different mindset. Instead of asking how he could make money and how much, he asked himself what was the right thing to do? His answer was to write The Toilet Paper Entrepreneur. Today it is a cult classic in the entrepreneurial and business worlds. From there he went on to write The Pumpkin Plan, another insta-classic and then his latest best-seller Profit First. His most recent book is what we spend a great deal of the show talking about today. He gives us a quick overview of what the book is about and how to incorporate the topic into our own finances. The nitty-gritty of Profit First is this: businesses who set aside a portion of their cashflow first as profits will be more profitable and lucrative in the long run than those who wait and see if there's anything left at the end of the fiscal year. It's all based around an idea called Parkinson's Theory, which (highly simplified) says you'll use up whatever is there no matter how great or small the amount. Whether it's toothpaste, toilet paper or money, you're going to use whatever amount you give yourself and make available to be consumed. So Mike's contention is that businesses and people alike should be taking a portion of funds out first (ie putting profit first) and dispensing them into accounts they cannot touch. If you are an entrepreneur, when you get paid set up your account to automatically withdraw a percentage and put it into a retirement fund. If you're employed talk to your employer about your 401(k); get it set up so it automatically deducts money before you even see your paycheck. Based on Parkinson's Theory you'll learn to live off the amount that's leftover. But if you don't automate this you won't do it, you'll end up spending all the money that's available to you. Even if it seems like you can't afford to set aside any money right now Mike says to start with 1% of your paycheck. If you make $1k a week, then have 1% taken out. It's only $10, you won't even notice. But over time that money will start to add up in your retirement fund and soon you'll have far more wealth than you thought you could accrue. This is a fairly watered-down version of Mike's teachings so tune in to hear the full details straight from the source! And after you do, thank Mike for being here and gracing us with his priceless knowledge. And thank yourselves for being here (I do) and we'll see you next time. THANKS MIKE MICHALOWICZ! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let Mike know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Mike on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Mike Michalowicz's web siteMike Michalowicz on TwitterProfit First, Mike Michalowicz' latest bookThe Toilet Paper Entrepreneur, Mike Michalowicz' first book The Pumpkin Plan, Mike Michalowicz' second book   You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

Be in charge, no matter what. "Tension is what holds people's attention."-Oren Klaff The Cheat Sheet: Why repoire-building doesn't work. The power of scarcity in any scenario. What do you need to convince people? How long is the average human attention span? What's the power frame and why does it matter? And so much more... Have you ever wondered how someone shifts the power of a situation into their own hands? Do you find yourself feeling like you're the low man on the totem pole in any (or maybe every) area of your life? Even if you answered no to both of those questions, you'll want to hear this episode with Oren Klaff author of Pitch Anything. Oren helps people sell companies for a living. And not just any company, we're talking deals in $200 million range. Think that's not relevant to you? It is. High stakes, pressure-filled situations like the ones he's in magnify the buying behaviors in all of us. Whether you're asking a girl out, requesting a raise or pitching for funding for your latest business, you'll want to know what he knows. Listen in for all of that and so much more on episode 347 of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: On this episode with Oren Klaff he dispels a few myths about the buyer behavioral process. For example, do you think you need to build rapport with the person you're selling to? Nope, a waste of time and energy according to Oren. If you position yourself as the expert and authority on your service or product, and create a scarcity mentality in the buyer's mind you're well on your way. Let's look at how to raise your position to being a leader and an expert. Now bear in mind as we do this it'll be in a sales-type example, but if that doesn't apply to your job then reframe it to fit an area of your life where you do want better results (ie your relationships, your dating life). First off don't go into lengthy introductions at the beginning of your presentation. Your audience doesn't need to know about that mega-deal you did last year, they need to know your name and what you do currently. Keep the introductions brief, then get everyone's agreement to go full throttle into the presentation and discussion. When you do that, you're holding their attention. During your presentation keep it to 20 minutes or shorter, that is the absolute longest human beings can pay attention to anything in this type of setting. A person's attention span will not go longer than 20 minutes if you don't have their full buy in, such as in a sales setting. During those twenty minutes you'll be able to frame what you have to offer them, you'll be showing them why what you have is the best and why you are the expert. This is your chance to elevate your status with them and also make them feel comfortable in the buying process. As the clock winds down you will raise the stakes and create scarcity in their minds about working with you and your product or service. Oren gives specific wording on how to do this. At the heart of creating scarcity is this idea: what you have and what you provide expertise in is SO great that if your buyer doesn't get it, they will be diminished in some way. You must know that, believe it and feel it internally before you can create scarcity and tension during your pitch. On the topic of tension, Oren says this isn't something to avoid the way many of us do. Tension is what lets people know the stakes are high in this scenario. If you're talking to someone and there's no tension, they obviously don't value the topic you're talking about. If you're pitching something to them, they don't see the value in what you're pitching and they don't care if they get it or not. Without tension, the situation has no value. Naturally the amount of tension should be higher or lower depending on the scenario! Oren and I go into greater detail on how to pitch anything and each of the above-mentioned topics on today's show. Even if you aren't in sales in your job or your business you're going to want to hear what he has to say, it's all pretty darn valuable. Let's thank Oren for joining us and thank you for being here. We'll see you next time. THANKS OREN KLAFF! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let Oren know by clicking on the link below and sending him a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank Oren on Twitter! Resources from this episode: Oren Klaff's web siteOren Klaff on TwitterPitch Anything, Oren Klaff's latest book You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)!   HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!

How to have it all as a single dad. "You can be vulnerable, while still being confident."-Dave, single dad The Cheat Sheet: How to be confident AND vulnerable with everyone. Put an end to "Nice Guy Syndrome" once and for all. How to talk with your kids about anything. Reframing: how to apply it to everything from traffic to dating: How soon do you tell your date about your kids? And so much more… One of the most frequent questions I get asked comes from single dads, they want to know how to date now that they're fathers. So here to answer that question and to talk about the differences the live training Art of Charm programs have made in their lives are two single dads, Dave and Tom. Even if you aren't a dad this episode is beneficial for you; you'll hear from two graduates about what their lives were like before doing an AOC training and what their lives were like after. They talk candidly and frankly about themselves, fatherhood and the AOC programs. Join us for all of that and more on the 345th episode of The Art of Charm. More About This Show: As a listener of this show you most likely know we offer training programs, and if you haven't taken one yet you may be wondering if they're worth your time and effort. Rather than talking your ear off ourselves, we've brought in two alumni to share what their personal experiences were. Tom and Dave are both single dads who have taken some of our programs and they both faced similar difficulties before coming in: they weren't fully present with their kids, they had major difficulties in even talking with women, let alone dating and they generally were looking for better quality relationships than the ones they had. So despite the significant challenges they both signed up and participated in our live programs. On today's episode Dave shares first about his before and after. He says he was incredibly negative and angry all the time, especially with his ex-wife. He allowed her to "walk all over him" with their custodial arrangement of their daughter; she would be late when picking their daughter up after his visits, with no regard to the impact it was having on Dave. But Dave never said anything, he just reacted in a passive-aggressive manner which kept him in a negative, ticked off state around the clock. But after taking a course with the Art of Charm, Dave realized he needed to set and maintain better boundaries. And not just with ex, with every area of his life including work and his personal relationships. By doing small, simple things over a period of time he grew his confidence so he could set and maintain his boundaries. And he found the courage to have a vulnerable conversation with the mother of his child about how her actions were impacting his life. By being vulnerable with her, and doing it in a courageous way, they were able to calmly work out a better solution for everyone (especially their daughter). But that wasn't the only relationship that was positively impacted by Dave's newfound confidence. His relationship with his daughter changed for the better. He feels much more present when he's with her, he's able to give her his undivided attention and to be a strong, positive role model in her life. In response she has blossomed. She's become outgoing and now makes friends on her own, something she never did before. Tom has had a similar impact in his own life. As the single dad of a now-teenage boy, Tom was initially floored by his ex-wife's request for a divorce. Once he got over his shock and dismay they were able to have a healthy relationship and able to easily share custody of their boy. But Tom wasn't at all prepared to be a single dad. Before working with The AOC, Tom was consistently worried he wasn't being a good enough father for his son. He was concerned he wasn't living up to his full potential and wasn't being a good example for his boy. And he didn't feel like he could really talk, connect and bond with his son to the extent he wanted to. For Tom having a deeper relationship with his son was so important because it was something he never had with his dad, Tom wanted to break the cycle and really be there for his young son. Since participating in The AOC programs Tom is happy to report he and his son take many adventures together, and talk about everything even vulnerable and delicate subjects. Tom is more confident with his son and he's more confident in public, something his boy has noticed and even commented on. One thing they both agree on is they are now able to ask for what they want. They no longer act in passive-aggressive ways, they are clear in their communication with everyone from business partners and colleagues to the women they date. On the topic of dating they both feel far more confident in connecting and dating then they ever have before. Dave says before the program he had gotten 2 women's numbers in 4 years and now he could get 2 numbers just walking the down the street! And Tom had no clue about how to date after his divorce, but today he's learned how to chat with a woman and find out if she's someone he'd want to have a relationship with. Tom and Dave also discuss the impact these programs have had on their friendships and their general quality of life, have a listen to get the full download! This is a terrific episode for any of you who are single dads, might become fathers or have been thinking about signing up for one of our live training programs. Enjoy, thank you for listening and we'll see you next time. THANKS AOC! If you enjoyed this session of The Art of Charm Podcast, let us know by clicking on the link below and sending a quick shout out on Twitter: Click here to thank The AOC on Twitter! Resources from this episode: AOC live training programsThe AOC on Twitter Dr. Robert Glover on the No More Mr. Nice Guy episode of The AOC You'll also like: -The Art of Charm Toolbox -Best of The Art of Charm Podcast Wanna leave a comment? Too bad! Email me instead (we read everything)!   HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING.  Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!  

Author and financial advice favorite Tom Corley stops by to discuss his new book, "Rich Kids" and tell us how to teach our kids habits that will prepare them for success later in life. HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dug this episode, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from all the fluff out there. Ways to subscribe to The Art of Charm Click here to subscribe via iTunes Click here to subscribe via RSS You can also subscribe via Stitcher FEEDBACK + PROMOTION Hit us up with your comments and guest suggestions. We read EVERYTHING. Download the FREE AoC app for iPhone Email jordan@theartofcharm.com Give us a call at 888.413.7177 Stay Charming!