Geoff Lloyd with Annabel Port

Happy World Book Day! No? Oh well, we can still talk about books a bit, not in a boring way you understand, but in a fun, lively Hometime way. Berlusconi and Star Wars are also mentioned, but not in the same link. That would just be strange casting.

Geoff and the team delve into the minds of listeners...actually, that's going a bit far, but I wanted to suck you into the description by making it sound a bit sci fi. Anyway, they talk about a number of topics, including a story about a gunman flinging pigeons around!

Geoff is joined by friend of the show (we say that, but he's actually friends with Geoff more than the rest of us), Chris Addison, and they get along famously, talking about all manner of things. It's probably better that I don't spoil the surprise and you just listen to this and find out exactly what they discuss.

Geoff is back to discuss the Queen's toilet habits, disgusting jobs, haggling and Chairman Mao. Whatever else you may say about him, you can't deny he's conversationally diverse...

You know when you like a celebrity a lot, and you know everything about them and their life, but you're not that interested in their career otherwise? You're not a stalker or anything, you just like them. A lot. Ok, it's a difficult topic to summarise, but that's basically what we're talking about at various points throughout the show.

Seeing teachers where they shouldn't be, being old before your time and what you've seen through windows- all this features in today's podcast. Plus, Geoff starts an important campaign to bring back people called Benny.

What were you doing on the eve of the Pope's last day as...erm...the Pope? Well we were doing a radio show to take your mind off the whole thing. Actually, Geoff and Annabel managed to mention him quite a lot, so it probably won't take your mind off him. Or his little red shoes...

Do you remember that time you went up to your mate in the pub and grabbed him round the waist and kissed him on the cheek, only it wasn't your mate, it was Duncan Goodhew? Well, that sort of thing forms the basis for at least one of the things we talk about tonight.

"I was walking around for ages and nobody told me..." is just one of the things that Geoff discusses today on the show, alongside odd packed lunches, and in many ways, isn't that a metaphor for this; an odd radio packed lunch? Kind of anyway.

Geoff and the team finish off the week in the only way they know how- by doing a radio show for the exact number of hours they're contracted to do. It is however, a lot of fun, so dive in (metaphorically speaking), and listen (literally).

Swallowing things, not going to places, and improving things. Those catagories are just three things that will make more sense to you after you listen to this podcast. We also hammer up some more plaques on the Dead Dogs Memorial Wall.

A busy busy old show today, as we speak to Pete Donaldson live at the Brit awards, we also speak to Alt J, Paloma faith, and Dave bloody Grohl- get in! In between that we also host our own version of the awards- the Instant Brit Awards- they're as prestigious as they sound.

This show is so packed full of tasty Hometime goodness that it would be a disservice to attempt to summarise it into a small description. However, we will say that if you're a regular listener one thing you might not expect is a debate on quantum mechanics- you're going to get one though, and it's a beauty.

It's a sad day as we've lost not one, not two, but THREE celebrities, so to distract ourselves, we hear some lovely tales from both Geoff and the listeners; ever wanted to hear a story about a man who got drunk at 10am and bought a python by mistake? Good, cos there's one inside.

It's that time of the year where we ask you to tell us about your dad's best mate- what they do and an interesting thing about them. There's more obviously, but I didn't want to spoil the surprise, so I just told you the first part.