Sick and Wrong

Jewish Sex Commandos decide to make the internet cleaner for everyone. A spurned lesbian decides to make her butch life-partner even uglier. A wayward young alcoholic decides to make her friend's infant less top-heavy. Also, some Canadians decide to make Tim Horton's coffee taste just a little shittier.

A discussion of a confusing 'Christian Porn' website created by a couple of hipsters or evangelicals (hard to figure out which). An amateur castration clinic-S and M dungeon is busted North Carolina. An unbalanced dad in the midwest has watched 'The Omen' one too many times. Also, a listener writes in about a greased up would-be kung-fu fighter.

Lance finds a great website: mydeathspace.com. An Ohio senior citizen decides that the snot-nosed neighbor kid has pushed him quite far enough. A drug-addled Seattle man shoots up a bunch of rave-goers (to be fair, they were dressed up as zombies). Also, a sex-story from a listener involving a lima bean.

D. tells us how he spent his day off from work stepping in hobo-shit. A Polish immigrant in Chicago is so angry at his girlfriend back in the mother-land that he decides to throw his vitals at the police. A Texas bus driver decides that his girlfriend deserves a good branding for her transgressions. A listener tells us of his now ex-girlfriend's St. Paddy's day drunken hijinx.

It's the Saint Patrick's Day show. Australian Phillip Parks had enough of his nagging invalid mother. Curtis Adams had enough of being broken up with his ex-girlfriend. Both guys resort to mayhem for a redress of their grievances. Also, a listener provides follow-up on the Chinese kitten-crusher.

A shout out to the Reach-Around Foundation is provided. Priapism keeps a German man out of prison. A Chinese woman makes a sexual-political statement by crushing a kitten's head with her high-heel. A German listener learns about a serial killer in junior high in the name of ethics.

Lance has feelings of genital inadequacy. Women are shown to get angry when you try to bite part of their face off. A man, on the other hand, will sit down and share a meal of his penis if you fry it up right. Also, some guy likes to drink little boys' pee.

D. proclaims himself the new Lord of the Ring, but not quite as gay as Frodo. Lance attempts to maintain his winning streak with an anthropological treatise on the traditions of a tribe of gentle primitives living off the coast of New Delhi. D. counters with a rich guy who likes to fuck little furry things. Also, something about a murder over ass-wipes.

D. and Lance summon America's badasses to a task gone too long unaddressed. Australia makes a Sick and Wrong contribution in the form of everyone's favorite type of druggie (the murderous type). Preacher puppy fast-ball from Florida. Also, listener emails.

More Sick and Wrong behavior is uncovered in America! Martinez Madman metes out mayhem! Connecticut college kids cover co-ed with ***! Also, face transplants, and Dee hauls an embarrassing skeleton out of Lance's closet.

Lots to talk about: vampiric central valley housewives, greedy english whores, how to get drugs into the country, and how to get drugs in Ohio. Also, Dee Simon's latent patriotism is affronted by a new Canadian serial killer, and listener email.

Discussion of the many lucrative possibilities of door-to-door tattooing and when animal husbandry goes awry. Also, undesirable home improvements and listener email.

Simon and Wackerle sink their teeth into the ancient art of Oregonian leg-fighting, and do-it-yourself (DIY) mummification. Also, a few words about the scourge of carry-on luggage. Also, GAY PORN!

Discussion ranging from Russian medical oddities to drug-addled teenage sex-fiends in Illinois (or Vermont?). Also, Dave fills us in on the romantic side of his life.

Dave and Lance cover nursing home worker revenge, The Scorpions, fun things you can do with your penis, and what to do if your friend claims atheism. Also, a short discussion of 'upper-decking'. (Special hour-long premier episode)