Lou Reads the Internet for YOU! show

Lou Reads the Internet for YOU!

Summary: Lou goes to places you never even wanted to know existed on the internet and returns with a podcast you can't stop listening to. All the posts he reads are real even if you don't want to believe it! Sometimes disturbing, sometimes enlightening but always fun to listen to. Some examples of places Lou has gone are a forum for heroin addicts where junkies share their tips on how to negotiate the world of heroin for new junkies, a different forum where people share their most awkward sexual encounters and yet another forum where teenagers who believe they are vampires tell of the time they discovered their true-selves. The internet changes everyday and Lou is there looking for the craziest and most interesting stuff to read about. Check it out today!

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  • Artist: King Lou Fernandez
  • Copyright: Copyright © King Lou Fernandez, 2009-Present

Podcasts:

 Lou Reads ep128: Tales of Mean Customers from AskReddit | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 31:48

I hope you enjoy this lighter fare as once again we delve into Reddit. Won’t you enjoy this selection of tales of people being treated poorly by jerks while they do their jobs.

 Lou Reads from the pages of My Little Waifu | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 44:31

How do you cope with your day to day struggles? Do you call your mom to vent or maybe see a psychiatrist? Or do instead slowly become convinced you are having a relationship with a fictional character? That is what is happening on the pages of the forum known as My Little Waifu. I won’t even try to explain what I read this time around. It doesn’t make any sense and explaining it requires navigating several different strata of super nerdy nonsense. Just listen… It’s still won’t make any sense but whatever. Terms used in this episode that may require explanation: 1) Waifu 2) Brony 3) Weeabo 4) Clop 5) Ship And many more…. Please enjoy the podcast & this wonderful selection of Japanese body pillows for you to consider marrying in the future.

 Lou Reads ep126 – Squat the Planet: Advice for the Homeless by the Homeless | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 37:59

Hey man, can you spare any change? Spare anything? Even a smile helps. Also a lot of drugs to help me forget I beg for a living and sleep on the streets would help more than a smile. I’m just being honest. So this episode is about the worldful world of gutterpunks, crusties, hobos, bums or whatever you want to call this nations wandering house-less people. It is amazing, and yet unsurprising, that the homeless have such ready access to the site known as Squat The Planet. But just because they are roaming the world rudderless doesn’t mean they don’t want to have a place to have stupid discussions and share their best criminal practices! Won’t you please enjoy this sampling of nonsense from the pages of StP.

 Lou Reads ep125 – Porn Fan Chats from Brazzers Forum | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 42:36

Look, I love porn. I am a man. I have a sad addiction to watching people who are better at sex than me go at it for unrealistic lengths of time. I love to be reminded of the average to subaverageness of my man parts and that my testicles don’t contain massive amounts of semen (aka pina colada mix). Thats why I go the forums at BrazzerForum.com to complain and compliment my favorite porn stars! Or, I would if I was one of the people who are actually registered on there. Sadly, I am not so obsessed with the world of pornography to know who the people I read about were (for the most part.) Luckily for us the guys and gals who do hang out at Brazzers Forum feel perfectly at home chatting about their favorite porn moments. I do admire the actors availability to the people posting there. It’s kind of sweet thinking about a porn star reading a fans email about how awesome he is at fucking and the porn star writing back,  “Aw shucks. Thanks little guy. I’m glad I made your day. Keep jerkin’ it to the video of my strangely massive dong. Yours truely, XXX INSERT NAME HERE XXX.” Enjoy the show!

 Lou Reads episode 124 – Tales of Creepy Gamers from RPG.net | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 43:39

This episode takes a peek into the world of role playing gamers and the creepy players they occasionally run into. That image joke will make more sense if you listen to the episode. Also, don’t play Tomb of Horrors. Even if you win you’ll probably die in the end.

 Lou Reads from the Discussions at Virgin-Forums | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 39:15

Ah, the shame of being a virgin. That awful secret that you haven’t gotten some dummy to let you put your penis in them or given up the nappy dug-out to some chump on a camping trip. What a super awful time in life! Well, that is unless you’re super proud of your choice to not have fun teenage sex, like the people at Virgin-Forum.com. This is a site for people who are virgins, and sometimes not, to get together and talk about their virginity or lack there-of. Thanks for listening! I hope you enjoy it as much as you enjoy all that post virginity sex you’re all having.

 Lou Reads Revisits the Poz Experience at Raw Top’s Breeding Zone | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 52:38

This podcast is going to make you laugh and probably make you a little uncomfortable. Or it might just make you feel sad. It’s unlikely to make you feel horny… unless you actually hang out at Raw Top’s Breeding Zone (Do I have to say it’s NSFW?). Anyway, Its been almost 4 years since I read from The Breeding Zone and thank the Lord, the posters there have not gotten any less graphically horrible about what they are into/doing. As always with topics beyond the pale, if it helps you sleep at night, I’ll allow you to reserve the right to believe the more crazy things are pure fiction. But… yeah… ENJOY? Oh yeah, I’d like to thank The Breeding Zone for always wishing me a happy birthday!

 Lou Reads 121: Discussions from the Forums of DefensiveCarry.com | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 41:09

Hey all you gun-loving podcast fans out there. I know that maybe when you’re listening to podcasts your situational awareness may not be at its height. So, I implore you to look around while you’re listening to this podcast. Also, while listening, please keep your hand on your holster at all times. One can’t be too careful these days. I mean, what if something happened? Would you be ready to defend yourself AND listen to podcasts? These are important topics, to be sure. This episode is all about people who are concerned about their right to carry a firearm. So lock the 6 locks on your bedroom door, get inside your safe room and press play. It will all make sense. I promise.

 Lou Reads – Anonymous Confessions from 2005 | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 32:21

This episode is drawn straight from the Comedy Goldmine threads from the Something Awful archives. It features en-edited confessions that were sent in anonymously by the members of the Something Awful forums. I hope you enjoy it. The titles pretty much says it all! On and by the way….

 Lou Reads ep119: Dumb Things Done on Drugs | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 34:53

I hope you find it a breath of fresh air after the last episodes anal destruction theme. I promise no anal anything this episode. If you want to do some anal stuff while you listen that is your God damn business! This episode is basically people sharing dumb stuff they’ve done on drugs. I don’t have much to say about it beyond that. Maybe, just “Thanks to all the drug users out there who are so wonderfully open about sharing their experiences on the internet.” I hope you enjoy it. You may enjoy it more if you are on drugs.

 Lou Reads ep118: Tales of Anal Destruction from FetLife.com | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 33:45

Hey, I’m talking to you! If would you take that 2 liter bottle of soda out of your ass once in a while maybe you could pay attention to me when I tell you that I just read from the highly disturbing pages of Fetlife.com again. What did I read? Well, it just so happens that I read from a couple of groups who are dedicated to severe ass stretching. So severe, in fact, that I didn’t even feel like I could find an image that would do it justice or that I could stomach… THAT BAD! Ok one image. Anyway, please enjoy this episode if you can. It’s full of some pretty intensely crazy… stuff. Thanks for listening!

 Lou Reads Black Friday Nightmares from AskReddit | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 36:35

Hey, 2013 is over! The holiday season is over! What better time than now to look back at the experiences of the retail workers who had to deal with insane shoppers on Black Friday! Ok, I agree. Anytime would have been fine. I picked now. HAPPY NEW YEAR, EVERYBODY!! Here’s hoping to another year full of internet bizarreness and other related silly pursuits! If you’re interested you can find the original Reddit thread here. Thanks for listening!

 Lou Reads Stories of Hooking Up with Celebrities from Groupies (from AskReddit) | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 28:46

I have never had sex with a famous person but these people (claim to) have… The closest I think I got was harassing Siouxsie Sioux at a bar once. Wait, there was never any chance of me having sex with her. I was just bugging her. People like to have sex because it fun. But sex with a famous person is so much better, right? Well, the people in these stories proudly claim to have been with famous people, in a biblical way. Or at least they claim to know a person who knows a person…. Well, all that matters is they shared stories. You can choose to believe them or not. I believe everything I read about John Mayer. Enjoy.

 Lou Reads ep115: True Stories of Emergency Medical Service Workers | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 43:33

Hey, next time your pondering taking that razor blade swallowing bet your friends dared you to do, or you’re about to impale yourself with a giant dildo while on your Lil’ Rascal Scooter, take a moment to think of the men and women who work in the local emergency medical services world. Is your stupidity going to make them have to come over to your house and save your stupid ass? Probably… And then guess what! The story of how they had to come and save you is going to end up on the internet! Yup! This episode is chok’ful of true stories related by the EMS workers of the Something Awful forums. I think that speaks enough for itself. I hope you enjoy it. Sincerely, Lou

 Lou Reads Interview on Digital Gonzo | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: Unknown

Giving voice to stuff you didn't want to hear!

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