Save Your Sanity - Help for Toxic Relationships

Understanding the many faces of gaslighting helps you see it coming. Then, seeing it for what it is, you can discount it, reject and deny it. In this episode, I help you see ten faces of gaslighting that can help you recognize it for what it is: emotional abuse. The actual definition of gaslighting I like from www.urbandictionary.com is: "an increasing frequency of systematically withholding factual information from, and/or providing false information to, the victim - having the gradual effect of making them anxious, confused, and less able to trust their own memory and perception"It has so many faces, some that you might not immediately think of as gaslighting...until now. I often think of gaslighting as times when someone wants to define your reality for you, rather than trusting you and your senses. It's nasty, as well as sneaky. It's definite intention is to undermine your confidence in yourself in every way. Too often, it's a successful ploy! HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: Why gaslighting is a huge issue in eroding self-confidence 10 ways gaslighting shows up and how to recognize them Examples of gaslighting Why it is essential to recognize the different ways a #Hijackal will attempt to gaslight you Hopefully, by the time you hear all ten, you'll say "No More!" A person who thinks they can tell you what you think, feel, need, want, prefer, or remember is a person to watch out for. Beware, though, because they wear you down, you may have a tendency to believe them. Don't! They are using and abusing you, and you deserve to be treated with respect, care, love, and honesty. Here's the link to my video I mentioned: Healthy Responses to Gaslighting While you on my YouTube channel, subscribe at hit the notification bell so you'll know when there is a new video. Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerCLUBHOUSE: @drshalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Support Circle. Save $24 on your first three months.----------------------------------------------------------------------#gaslighting #underminingselfconfidence #erodingselfconfidence #makingmewrong #questionmysanity #secondguessmyself #whydoesmypartner #canitrustmypartner #iknowyoubetterthanyouknowyourself #notrust #crazymakingbehavior #trustinrelationship#savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #emotionaltrauma #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #drshaler #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

You may think that you're experiencing the natural wear and tear on your health. But, if you're in a toxic relationship, it is making things so much worse! Learn about the most likely ways your body and its immune system can respond to toxic relationships with narcissistic people, or antisocial people. Talk about wear and tear!!! Two things that cause physical health issues (among many) start with emotional abuse: stress and isolation. Both of those are present in most relationships with Hijackals, right? Constant stress and the pressure to not talk about difficulties with others outside the relationship. Very common. In this episode, I share some research findings from Dr. Gabor Mate that relate to this where he said, "The very same brain centers that interpret and feel physical pain also become activates during experiences of emotional rejection." Sound familiar? This can be terribly enhanced if, perchance, you had a narcissistic mother--a Hijackal mother--and then went on to be in a relationship with another Hijackal. It takes such a toll on you! Dr. Hughes has a wonderfully refreshing approach to medicine as she tempers Western medicine with Eastern thought and practices. Enjoy her insights! HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: What is the "rodent brain" and how it affects us What happens in your body when it is on alert too long due to the stress of a toxic relationship What causes "fuzzy brain" How stress affects the body from production of different hormones How trauma--old or current--affects the body, emotional trauma, physical trauma, sexual trauma, abandonment How the immune system distinguishes what is toxic and what is safe How this all relates to relationships with difficult people, toxic people, narcissists, psychopaths, sociopaths, borderlines I hope you find connections within yourself to what in your relationships might be causing health issues. Often, until you realize that, you can have physical symptoms that seemingly cannot be explained. This episode might help with that. Be good to yourself.Rhoberta GUEST: ELIZABETH HUGHES, MDDr. Hughes is a dermatologist and former faculty member at Stanford University, where she taught dozens of physicians, including many nationally-recognized leaders in the field of dermatology.Nearly twenty years after graduating from medical school, Dr. Hughes witnessed the rapid resolution of a patient’s chronic illness without any medical intervention. This event caused Dr. Hughes to question everything she had been taught about health and illness, and to look for better answers for “incurable” conditions.Her quest lead her to investigate ancient spiritual traditions, non-western systems of health and healing, placebo research, and the emerging sciences of epigenetics and psychoneuroimmunology. In the process, she became a registered yoga teacher, a certified health coach, and a practitioner of several energy medicine modalities.Dr. Hughes has developed a revolutionary approach to health based on establishing trust in the human body. Dr. Hughes believes that once each person has cultivated a deep and abiding trust in the power of the human body, our experience of health and illness will change for the better forever.FREE GIFT FROM ELIZABETH:The Stress Antidote GuideTheStressAntidote.comCONTACT INFO FOR ELIZABETH HUGHES:Website: ElizabethHughesMD.comPodcasts:LinkedIn: @ElizabethHughesMDFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/elizabethhughesmdInstagram: @Twitter:  https://twitter.com/jEHughesMDYouTube: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Want clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER! I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerCLUBHOUSE: @DrShaler-------------------------------------------------------------I WANT TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships. Join my Support Circles now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Ask Me Anything Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Relationship Help Support Circles  ----------------------------------------------------------------------#drelizabethhughes #stressandthebody #stresshormones #toxicrelationshipsandhealth #abuseandhealth #stressandtheimmunesystem #overactivestressresponse #psychoneuroimmunology #drgabormate #regaininghealthafteratoxicrelationship #canmyrelationshipruinmyhealth #nextstepsinhealth #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #hijackalabuse #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stoptoleratingabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #unhealthyrelationships #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #passiveaggressive #notgoodenough #relationshiphelp #verballyabusive #stopemotionalabuse #narcissisticabuse #emotionaltrauma #narcissism #psychopath #sociopath #emergingempowered Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

You want to believe that a Hijackal--a toxic, difficult, perhaps narcissistic person--love you. You SO want to believe it. They don't have much love to give and here's 16 ways to recognize that they aren't giving it to you. An eye-opener! People who love you listen to you. They want to listen to you. And, you want to listen to them. You're interested in each other. Not so with a #Hijackal. The Hijackal is interested in themselves and want you to be interested in them, too. Sure, in the beginning, it's different. That's how they hook you as I spoke about in the last episode, How Hijackals Hook You Into Toxic Relationships. You know from listening to the episode on the 3 MUST-HAVES in a Healthy Adult Relationship that equality is a must. Do you believe you have that in your relationship with a Hijackal? I'll be not. You may want to bring up a couple of instances when there seemed to be equality, but that's part of the problem. There's supposed to be equality all the time. There's an example of the love that's missing in a toxic relationship: love. Everything is transactional with a toxic person, a person with narcissistic tendencies, and those with anti-social tendencies as well. They don't really have love to give you, but they will appear to to have you give them what they want: a transaction. I know, it's not great to hear that straightforwardly, but it's absolutely important to recognize it. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: The transactional nature of toxic relationships 16 ways that love relationships differ from toxic relationships Why you must not continue to believe that you are loved and make excuses for poor behavior My definition of emotional abuse, and why you are best to keep it in mind Clear ways to recognize real love to compare and contrast with what a Hijackal offers you You SO want to believe that a Hijackal loves you, I know. Sometimes, it really seems that they do, but only when it serves their purposes and gets them what they want. Sad, and unfortunately, true. Hard to hear, but time to recognize it. Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Support Circle. Save $24 on your first three months.----------------------------------------------------------------------#doesheloveme #doessheloveme #loveshouldnthurt #thereisnoabuseinlove #equalityinrelationship #reciprocityinrelationship #mutualityinrelationship # #beassertive #personalweatherreport #narcissistsdontlove #cannarcissistslove #trustinrelationship #savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #emotionaltrauma #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #drshaler #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Hijackals create toxic relationships, and it's important to see the patterns, traits, cycles, and behaviors clearly. That's not easy, but it is necessary. If you've been with a Hijackal or other toxic person for long, you may feel as though you suffer from brain fog. You can't think straight and you're too exhausted to do so anyway. Gain perspective about your situation and best next steps to consider in this episode. Hijackals are those relentlessly difficult, toxic people who seem so perfect for you in the beginning, and eventually fade into mean, thoughtless, self-centered ones later in the relationship. That later can be two days after you marry or move in, or even fade slowly over a couple of years. But, fade it will. Then, what do you do.By the time you've been with a Hijackal for awhile, you may be exhausted from the constant put-downs, from being torn down and worn down. Hijackal count on that. You have to find your legs and stand up for yourself in very specific, non-confrontational ways. One of those ways is my Personal Weather Report. In the episode, I mentioned some videos I've made on it on my YouTube channel. While you're watching these, be sure to subscribe and click the Bell so that you'll know each time I add a video. Here are ones that relate to the Personal Weather Report: https://youtu.be/qD1pNMujj0khttps://youtu.be/mFCZohqaFMMhttps://youtu.be/0p-K2vKfRhAYou will also find all the details of how to give and receive a Personal Weather Report in my book, Kaizen for Couples. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: How a Hijackal hooks you Why Hijackals are in a rush to "get" you Knowing how to recognize the Hijackal patterns, traits, cycles, and behaviors The essential step of stopping enabling the Hijackal to behave badly My definition of assertiveness and why it's effective Practicing the PWR Being with a Hijackal in a supposedly romantic relationship can be huge disappointment on many levels. Get unhooked as soon as you can from their manipulations, and reclaim yourself now. Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Support Circle. Save $24 on your first three months.----------------------------------------------------------------------#hookedonhope #stopenabling #gettingoutofatoxicrelationship #amiinatoxicrelationship #seetoxicpeopleclearly #emotionallyhooked #stopcaringwhatatoxicpersonthinks #findyourvoice #beassertive #personalweatherreport #savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #drshaler #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

You hope, hope, hope that a narcissistic person will change. You buy into their promises to change. And, you cross your fingers! Change occurs for a hot minute...or even a warm week, right? And, then, nothing. What's up with that? People with narcissistic tendencies, or those diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, have a hard time listening and caring about changes you would like to see. You know that already. So, will #Hijackals ever change? Can narcissists ever change? Do they want to change? What reason would they need to actually care? Are they able to sustain changes...or interested in doin so? I'm delighted to have Dr. Laura Dabney as my return guest to discuss this very important issue that can drive you crazy. You want to believe they'll change, I know. Don't miss this episode. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: The differences between a diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder and having narcissistic tendencies Can you ever love a narcissistic person into loving you well? How to tell the differences between being loved and being used Can the core issues within a narcissistic person change? How best to indicate to a narcissistic person that there is a need for change Why narcissistic people cannot create emotional intimacy GUEST: LAURA DABNEY, MDLaura Dabney, MD has made a career of taking on psychiatry’s toughest challenges from treating complex, combined medical and psychological conditions, to ensuring the absolute privacy of powerful, high-profile patients. Dr. Dabney has, for decades, helped her patients change their lives for the better. And they recognize her for it. Dr. Dabney’s patients come for many reasons: depression and anxiety, recent break-ups or a lifetime of toxic relationships. Yet, despite the problems that brought them through her door, they describe her in the same terms again and again, calling her warm, knowledgeable, and committed to their success.GIFT FOR YOU: CONNECT WITH DR. LAURA DABNEY:WEBSITE: https://drldabney.comPODCAST: FACEBOOK:  https://www.facebook.com/LauraDabneycom/YOUTUBE:  https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCgTW_U6Zl8X41n1mOXYM3UQINSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/lauradabneycom/LINKEDIN:  https://www.linkedin.com/company/dr--laura-dabney-mdTWITTER: https://twitter.com/drldabney--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Want clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER! I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerCLUBHOUSE: @DrShaler -------------------------------------------------------------I WANT TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships. Join my Support Circles now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Ask Me Anything Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Relationship Help Support Circles  ----------------------------------------------------------------------#drlauradabney #cannarissistschange #canhijackalschange #whydontnarcissistslisten #shouldistaywithanarcissist #psychiatristtalkingaboutnarcissism #donarcissistscare #doesmynarcissistcareaboutme #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #hijackalabuse #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stoptoleratingabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #unhealthyrelationships #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #passiveaggressive #notgoodenough #relationshiphelp #verballyabusive #stopemotionalabuse #narcissisticabuse #emotionaltrauma #narcissism #psychopath #sociopathSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

The small, subtle, often sneaky words, actions, and gestures that are small or brief slights, insults, insinuations, or put downs used to marginalize you are microaggressions. These behaviors are frequent and painful. But, they are small and they catch you off guard, wondering if you should speak up. Or, would it be making a mountain out of a molehill? Is that familiar? Hand in hand with microaggressions are microinvalidations: small and frequent ways that you are discounted, dismissed, or denied. When a Hijackal or other toxic person denies that you know what you think, feel, need, want, or even have seen, it can be a microinvalidation. This episode helps you see the small papercuts that are intended to make you emotionally exhausted and bleeding to death. Nasty! To do something about them, though, you have to recognize them when they are happening. Then, using my PWR response as I outline, you have a way to counteract the effect of these microaggressions on you. (The PWR strategy is from my book, Kaizen for Couples, available from Amazon in print or ebook.)HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: Recognizing microaggressions What a Hijackal or other toxic person tries to do by using these microaggressions Why you are caught off guard by them and unsure of a response Clarity that these microaggressions used in toxic relationships are emotional abuse! Recognizing and responding to Microinvalidations Using the PWR (Personal Weather Report) to reclaim your space Empower yourself by catching these subtle, sneaky, nasty ways of putting you down, and using the PWR to respond. You'll feel better...although, don't expect the Hijackal to! Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Support Circle. Save $24 on your first three months.----------------------------------------------------------------------#microaggressions #microinvalidations #pwrresponse #personalweatherreport #recognizingmicroaggressions #respondingtomicroaggressions #respondingtomicroinvalidations #speakingupinthefaceofverbalabuse #savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #drshaler #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Ever wondered how you could possibly find forgiveness for a seemingly unforgivable act? Like being raped, beaten, and left for dead? Today's guest, Lois Wagner, found it, and she shares that journey with you today. Toxic relationships include many kinds of abuse: verbal abuse, emotional abuse, physical, sexual, financial, and spiritual abuse. Moving beyond the toxic relationships is the first step on the healing journey, with so much more to follow. In her book, Walking Without Skin: A Journey of Healing From Fear to Forgiveness to Freedom, she writes: As I walked out of that grey, sad, bad building, I didn’t notice the barbed wire, the electrified fencing, or the armed, bulletproof-vested security guards. I didn’t see the orange-overalled prisoners or hear their raucous laughter. I didn’t notice the wild Spring flowers incongruously surrounding the grey prison buildings. I didn’t see the grazing sheep and cattle, the blue cranes at the dam, or the backdrop of the magnificent snow-capped mountain.When I left that prison, I flew out of that place free from those physical and emotional walls and boundaries to a newfound freedom.Lois has used her experiences to craft invaluable programs and formulas to help young men and boys to see positive pathways in life, and to create attitudes and values that will serve them well. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: Finding the pathway to forgive the unforgivable Healing the pain of betrayal How toxic masculinity is created, and perpetuated How to bring up boys to be positive adults (p.s. It works for all of us, at any age!) B.R.A.V.E. = Boundaries. Respect. Agreement. Values and Vulnerability. Equality, Empathy, and Empowerment. GUEST: LOIS WAGNERAs a survivor of a violent attack and rape, our speaker today has moved from victim through survivor to thriver and beyond to freedom. Lois uses her experience to fight toxic masculinity and to help eradicate gender-based violence. She shares events and lessons from her own story moving her through fear into forgiveness to freedom and into the light. Lower your guard and find how to be BRAVE in a relationship and in the fight against domestic violence as we welcome Lois as she takes you on a journey of bravery. GIFT FOR YOU: Forgiveness Checklist https://www.walkingwithoutskin.com/forgiveness-checklist CONNECT WITH LOIS WAGNER: WEBSITE: https://www.walkingwithoutskin.com PODCAST: FACEBOOK: http://m.facebook.com/walkingwithoutskinYOUTUBE:  https://www.youtube.com/loiswagnercoachingconversationsforchangeINSTAGRAM: LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lois_wagner_TWITTER: https://www.twitter.com/loiswag--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Want clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER! I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler-------------------------------------------------------------I WANT TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships. Join my Support Circles now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Ask Me Anything Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Relationship Help Support Circles  ----------------------------------------------------------------------#walkingwithoutskin #loiswagner #toxicmasculinity #findingforgiveness #forgivemyrapist #leftfordead #violentrape #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #hijackalabuse #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stoptoleratingabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #unhealthyrelationships #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #passiveaggressive #notgoodenough #relationshiphelp #verballyabusive #stopemotionalabuse #narcissisticabuse #emotionaltrauma #narcissism #psychopath #sociopathSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Sneaky stuff this emotional brainwashing! It often starts slowly and seems understandable. But, it continues and tips you over into second-guessing yourself and questioning your sanity, right? And, down the slippery slope! Listen in to uncover what may be happening--or has happened--to you. Great start!What's actual brainwashing? Cambridge Dictionary: "the process of making someone believe something by repeatedly telling them its true and preventing any other information from reaching them. Hijackals and other toxic people certainly engage in emotional brainwashing. That's my term for repeatedly gaslighting you by stating that they know you better than you know yourself and they are right about what you think, feel, need, want, remember, and prefer. They continue that process by degrading, belittling, intimidating, manipulating, and lying in an attempt to make you believe that you are much less than you are.Does this sound familiar? It may have started only occasionally: making snide remarks about you, perhaps in front of others, in the hopes that they could embarrass or humiliate you and you would be unlikely to speak up. Nasty! Then, it escalates...and often, accelerates. You need to have a name for it. I call it "emotional brainwashing." See it to say no to it, otherwise, it will not stop. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: How emotional brainwashing shows up The phases of a toxic relationship and where the emotional brainwashing begins Recognizing that you cannot please a #Hijackal My story that can help you see why you may be denying the emotional brainwashing Remembering that it is not your fault, and what to think instead You did not set out to be trauma-bonded. It's nothing that you did. You were set up for it earlier in life, either by being healthy and happy and never imagining this could be the case, or by having been in traumatic relationships earlier in your life. It's not your fault.Now, that this is all clear to you, you're better equipped to make progress towards a happier, healthier life.Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Support Circle. Save $24 on your first three months.----------------------------------------------------------------------#traumabonding #traumabonds #emotionalbrainwashing #gaslighting #gaslightingisabuse #savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Trauma-bonding is circular. The abuser creates the trauma, and then wants you to turn to them when you're hurt and traumatized. You are traumatized by something the abuser does, and you want the abuser to feel understood and you lean in. Circular! That's why it is SO important to understand the fourteen signs of a trauma-bonded person that I talk about in this episode. You may recognized the patterns--and the drama--that you are experiencing or have experienced. So helpful! Dr. Patrick Carnes in The Betrayal Bond says that traumatic bonding occurs when "victims have a certain dysfunction attachment that occurs in the presence of danger, shame, or exploitation. There often is seduction, deception, or betrayal. There is always some form of danger or risk." That is that the very thing that hurts you draws you closer. No more, right? This episode could be a turning point in your life and in your relationships. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: The definition of trauma-bonding Understanding the addictive nature of trauma-bonding 14 signs of trauma-bonding from Dr. Patrick Carnes How you might mistake intensity for intimacy when in a relationship with a #Hijackal Dr. Shaler's definition of toxic relationships Insights into why you have felt as you do in destructive, toxic relationships You did not set out to be trauma-bonded. It's nothing that you did. You were set up for it earlier in life, either by being healthy and happy and never imagining this could be the case, or by having been in traumatic relationships earlier in your life. It's not your fault. Now, that this is all clear to you, you're better equipped to make progress towards a happier, healthier life. Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Support Circle. Save $24 on your first three months.----------------------------------------------------------------------#traumabonding #traumabonds #addictedtoabuse #addictedtotoxicrelationship #stopthecrazymaking #howtraumabonds #signsoftrumabonding #intensityisnotintimacy #savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Shame is often not spoken of, or acknowledged on both sides of an emotionally abusive relationship with anyone. Today's episode puts the spotlight on this component of emotional abuse, for both the perpetrator and the recipient. My guest, Beverly Engel, wrote in her most recent book, Escaping Emotional Abuse: Healing From the Shame You Don't Deserve: "Shame is the most destructive aspect of emotional abuse and it can be the most difficult to heal."Sometimes people stay in abusive relationships BECAUSE they feel that leaving one is shameful. After all, you chose to enter it, if it's a romantic relationship. Know this: emotionally abusive people pose as potential soulmates to lure you into giving them control over time. It's not your fault! You couldn't have known, in most cases. So, this episode will be ABSOLUTELY affirming for you, and can give you a new perspective that is empowering. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: Differences between conscious and unconscious abusers How we accept shame when we have had childhood abuse, childhood emotional neglect, or adverse childhood experiences Differences between shame and guilt Why shame is so hidden and, therefore, damaging The link between shame and narcissism Why Beverly Engel suggests that shame's counter emotion is pride GUEST: BEVERLY ENGEL Beverly Engel is an internationally recognized psychotherapist and an acclaimed advocate for victims of toxic relationships and sexual, physical, and emotional abuse. She is the author of 23 self-help books, including 3 bestselling books on emotional abuse: The Emotionally Abusive Relationship, The Emotionally Abused Woman, and Encouragements for the Emotionally Abused Woman. Engel is a licensed marriage and family therapist, and has been practicing psychotherapy for 40 years.She is author of the forthcoming book, ESCAPING EMOTIONAL ABUSE: Healing from the Shame You Don’t Deserve (Kensington, January 2021). She writes about the insidious damage of emotional abuse – a form of domestic violence - and the forms it can take (such as saying or implying that you are ugly, a bad parent, stupid, incompetent, or that no one else could love you). Once a person finally realizes they are being emotionally abused, it is debilitating shame that prevents them from first creating the emotional armor necessary to shield one’s identity from abusive messages, and then stepping away from the relationship.Engel shares the Five-Step Program she offers in her therapy practice, which has helped her victims overcome the shame of Emotional Abuse, and will also serve as a guide for your listeners who provide services to the emotionally abused.  GIFT FOR YOU: Not at this timeCONNECT WITH BEVERLY ENGEL:WEBSITE: https://www.healmyshame.comPODCAST: FACEBOOK: http://m.facebook.com/beverly.engel.96YOUTUBE:  INSTAGRAM: https://instagram.com/beverlyengelLINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/beverly-engel-2164217TWITTER: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Want clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER! I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler-------------------------------------------------------------I WANT TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships. Join my Support Circles now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Ask Me Anything Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Relationship Help Support Circles  ----------------------------------------------------------------------#healmyshame #healingmyshame #toxicshame #shameandemotionalabuse #escapingemotionalabuse #beverlyengel #passiveaggressive #childhoodemotionalneglects #CENS #adversechildhoodexperiences #ACEs #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #hijackalabuse #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stoptoleratingabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #unhealthyrelationships #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #passiveaggressive #notgoodenough #relationshiphelp #verballyabusive #stopemotionalabuse #narcissisticabuse #emotionaltrauma #narcissism #psychopath #sociopath Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

You think you're doing your best, giving your all, compromising, and cooperating. In a healthy relationship, that's great. In a toxic relationship, you'll be expected to over-give and more. It's a setup for emotional abuse. Listen in to see it even more clearly! You may hear the word "enabling" and know that it is not a good thing. That's true. Knowing what it IS so you can clearly observe it and recognize it is primary. My definition of enabling is: "When you usually step in to fix, solve, excuse, rationalize, justify, or make the consequences go away for the poor choices of others." Does that sound familiar? Sometimes, you're so exhausted that you let it wash over you, I know. That's just how #narcissists and #Hijackals want you to be: too tired, confused, and worn down to put up any resistance to their having more and more power in the relationship. You CAN stop enabling their behaviors, and stop in small steps. (That's what I help my clients do, and you can use my new client, one-time offer for a full hour session for only $97.)You are likely a good person who has done everything you can think of to please your partner or parent. #Hijackals simply won't be pleased for more than a hot minute. You've experienced that, right? So, lean in and listen, so you can think of your next best steps. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: 4 main reasons why you might enable a toxic relationship to continue What you may be hoping you'll get in response to the enabling (You won't.) Why being your wonderful self will never be good enough for a #Hijackal The dynamics of being with a toxic partner and their blame, shame, guilt, and fault-finding 8 ways a #narcissist or #Hijackal perpetrates emotional abuse When you get enmeshed and entangled in enabling, it leads to further and further emotional abuse. See it clearly now, and take action...no matter how small you start. Start! Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Support Circle. Save $24 on your first three months.----------------------------------------------------------------------#highcostofemotionalabuse #enabling #enablingdefinition #enablinganarcissist #enablingahijackal #stopenabling #makingconsequencesgoaway #whatisenabling #amianenabler #whytostopenabling #whyienable #stoptheemotionalabuse #savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Every now and again, everyone has an off minute, and says or does something unkind, thoughtless, or just plain hurtful. Toxic people have many traits that happen too consistently...and, too often. The difference between a person having a toxic moment, and a person who has many toxic traits is that the healthier person will acknowledge, take responsibility for, and apologize after behaving poorly. A #Hijackal--a relentlessly difficult, often narcissistic one--will not be accountable or responsible. They are even likely to blame their poor behavior on you! That's why it is SO important to take stock of what is going on in your relationship with a partner, parent, sibling, adult child, or co-worker. This episode will help you do that. I suggest you create a tally as you listen. How many of these 40 traits does the person exhibit? Oops! HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: My personal definition of a toxic relationship Why healthy people often give toxic people too much understanding, compassion, and "wiggle room." Passive-aggressive behaviors (Read my book on Amazon, Stop! That's Crazy-Making! How to Quit Playing the Passive-Aggressive Game ) 40 behaviors that create toxic relationships Ways to understand issues you may not have had your finger on before now Understanding the nature of a toxic relationship to make decisions about your future. If you had a toxic parent, you'll be more susceptible to finding a toxic partner acceptable. That's really something to watch for. Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Support Circle. Save $24 on your first three months.----------------------------------------------------------------------#signsofatoxicrelationship #signsyouareinatoxicrelationship #amiinatoxicrelationship #amiinatoxicrelationshipwithmymother #toxicrelationshipwithparents #toxicrelationshipwithpartner #toxicrelationshipwithsibling #toxicrelationshipsatwork #underminingbehaviorsinarelationship #underhandedbehaviors #savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Toxic relationships are created when a partner exploits the vulnerabilities of the other. If you have ADHD tendencies, you may easily miss red flags as you pay attention to the charms, and are intrigued by the possibilities of the fake future they paint so readily. Fear and shame also play a part you need to recognize. Hijackals have a honed sense of recognition of vulnerabilities. They are on high alert, looking for these to use to their advantage. You can be the most successful person and they'll see you as a challenge. Not good, at all! Diann Wingert shares her insights and studies to help us understand why people with ADHD may not see toxic relationships clearly, and stay too long even though they are experiencing emotional abuse. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: How ADHD affects your ability to see red flags when you meet someone new Traits women with ADHD have that makes them more susceptible to toxic relationships Why intuition sometimes fails to discern patterns of manipulation when ADHD is present Why verbal abuse and emotional abuse are sometimes not enough to make someone with ADHD leave a narcissist Reasons that people with ADHD fail to leave toxic relationships and to recognize emotional trauma GUEST: DIANN WINGERTDiann Wingert is a mindset and productivity coach for female entrepreneurs who identify with the traits of ADHD, officially diagnosed or not. During her 20-year career as a licensed psychotherapist, Diann saw many brilliant and ambitious women struggle with unidentified ADHD, including Diann herself. Since her own mid-life diagnosis, she now mentors women who are “driven but distracted” to get focused and overcome procrastination, perfectionism, and people-pleasing so they can craft a life and business they love. Diann offers both individual and small group virtual coaching and mentoring to women all over the world. She is a dynamic podcast guest on the topics of ADHD in high ability women, the mental health challenges of entrepreneurship, self care for the self employed and how women can cultivate an entrepreneurial mindset. GIFT FOR YOU: Wow! Diann is offering you three things at NO cost: 6 Steps to ADHD Mastery, The Driven Woman's Roadmap and the ADHD Signature Strengths Quiz. https://www.diannwingertcoaching.com/free-stuffCONNECT WITH DIANN WINGERT :WEBSITE: https://www.diannewingertcoaching.comPODCAST: The Driven Woman https://www.diannwingertcoaching.com/podcastFACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/diannwingertcoachingYOUTUBE:  INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/coachdiannwingert/LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/diannwingertcoaching/TWITTER: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Want clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH DR. RHOBERTA SHALER! I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler-------------------------------------------------------------I WANT TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships. Join my Support Circles now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Ask Me Anything Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Relationship Help Support Circles  ----------------------------------------------------------------------#toxicshame #adhd #add #attentiondeficitdisorder #attentiondeficityhyperactivitydisorder #whyadhdcausesmetomiss #impulsivitywithadd #missingredflags #diannwingert #thedrivenwoman #adhdcoachforfemaleentrepreneurs #femaleentrepreneurswithadhd #diannwingertcoaching #ihaveadhd #adhdandtoxicrelationships #passiveaggressive#relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #hijackalabuse #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stoptoleratingabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #unhealthyrelationships #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #passiveaggressive #notgoodenough #relationshiphelp #verballyabusive #stopemotionalabuse #narcissisticabuse #emotionaltrauma Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

People with narcissistic tendencies and traits want to have their way, and want you to do their bidding. If they really, really, really want something, or, if they are really, really, really afraid of losing something, they sometimes promise to change. How many promises has a narcissist--a narcissistic #Hijackal--made to you about changing behaviors? How many of those promises were kept? Right! Not many. Oh, yes, maybe for a hot minute things improved. That is usually to get you to believe that they sincerely mean what they say. The proof, though, is in the long-term, sustained changes. How many of those changes did you see? Learning more about why change isn't sustained is important. BUT, it doesn't excuse it. Save yourself from further emotional abuse. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: Why admitting a mistake is so difficult for a #narcissist, a #Hijackal 5 reasons #narcissists will give you the impression they are going to change Why #narcissists seldom change and narcissistic abuse prevails Why you get your hopes up when a #Hijackal changes even a little more to the positive Why toxic relationships stay the same How promising to change and not doing it contributes to emotional abuse Narcissists are abusive. Their very real fear of closeness gives them little ability or willingness to move in your direction. Promising to change but never actually changing is one way this shows up. See it clearly, even when hope tries to get in your way. You and your children need to be in healthy environments where there is no verbal abuse, no emotional abuse, and no other kind of abuse, either. Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Support Circle. Save $24 on your first three months.----------------------------------------------------------------------#whynottobelieveanarcissist #promisesofnarcissists #alwaysbelievebehavior #narcissistsseldomchange #dontgetyourhopesup #canIbelieveanarcissistspromises #believinganarcissist #believeanarcissist #promisestochange #narcissistpromisestochange #saveyourselffromabuse #savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

Hijackals use chemistry to manipulate and control you. They exploit it to feel they have power over you. It is a significant part of trauma-bonding. Get clear on what's really happening when you think you're in love, rather than knowing you're being used. HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE: What lust, attraction, and attachment have to do with creating toxic relationships Why #Hijackals want to recreate their trauma from a position of control What part trauma-bonding plays in thinking you have chemistry with a toxic person How #Hijackals depend on the chemistry to keep you hooked in a toxic relationship, a verbally abusive relationship How misused chemistry can lead to emotional abuse Chemistry may draw you back to a relationship of narcissistic abuse and emotional trauma. You may confuse it with love. It isn't love. Don't be fooled. Stop the trauma-bonding, too! Big hugs!RhobertaWant clarity, insights, strategies, and support from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: Introductory session for new clients, $97CONNECT WITH ME: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...WEBSITE: https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.comPODCAST: http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.comFACEBOOK: https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctorTWITTER: https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShalerLINKEDIN: https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShalerINSTAGRAM: https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShalerPINTEREST: https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShalerYOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp-------------------------------------------------------------I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,join my Support Circle now.Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.WOW! Join now. Dr. Shaler's Support Circle. Save $24 on your first three months.----------------------------------------------------------------------#traumabonding #chemistryisnotenough #verballyabusive #dontgobacktoabuse #lust #attraction #attachment #don'tmistakechemistryforlove #chemistryisnotcaring #goingbacktoanabuser #gotchemistry #sexualchemistrycanbedangerous#savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest Support this show http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist. See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.