How the Strong Pull of Trauma-Bonding Creates Addiction to a Toxic Relationship




Save Your Sanity - Help for Toxic Relationships show

Summary: <p><strong>Trauma-bonding is circular</strong>. The abuser creates the trauma, and then wants you to turn to them when you're hurt and traumatized. You are traumatized by something the abuser does, and you want the abuser to feel understood and you lean in. Circular! </p><br><p>That's why it is SO important to understand the fourteen signs of a trauma-bonded person that I talk about in this episode. You may recognized the patterns--and the drama--that you are experiencing or have experienced. So helpful! </p><br><p>Dr. Patrick Carnes in The Betrayal Bond says that traumatic bonding occurs when <em>"victims have a certain dysfunction attachment that occurs in the presence of danger, shame, or exploitation. There often is seduction, deception, or betrayal. There is always some form of danger or risk." </em></p><br><p>That is that the very thing that hurts you draws you closer. No more, right? This episode could be a turning point in your life and in your relationships. </p><br><p><strong><span class="ql-cursor"></span>HIGHLIGHTS OF TODAY'S EPISODE:</strong></p><ul> <li>The definition of trauma-bonding</li> <li>Understanding the addictive nature of trauma-bonding</li> <li>14 signs of trauma-bonding from Dr. Patrick Carnes</li> <li>How you might mistake intensity for intimacy when in a relationship with a #Hijackal</li> <li>Dr. Shaler's definition of toxic relationships</li> <li>Insights into why you have felt as you do in destructive, toxic relationships</li> </ul><p><br></p><p>You did not set out to be trauma-bonded. It's nothing that you did. You were set up for it earlier in life, either by being healthy and happy and never imagining this could be the case, or by having been in traumatic relationships earlier in your life. <strong>It's not your fault.</strong> </p><br><p>Now, that this is all clear to you, you're better equipped to make progress towards a happier, healthier life. </p><br><p>Big hugs!</p><p>Rhoberta</p><br><p><strong>Want clarity, insights, strategies, and support</strong> from me, Dr. Rhoberta Shaler? We can talk: <a href="https://forrelationshiphelp.com/join" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Introductory session for new clients, $97</a></p><br><p><strong>CONNECT WITH ME</strong>: I invite you to like my pages and follow for further help with recognizing toxic relationships, realizing their impact, realigning your life, and recovering your self-confidence and ability to love and trust again.</p><br><p><strong>FOLLOW DR. RHOBERTA SHALER...</strong></p><p><strong>WEBSITE: </strong><a href="https://www.forrelationshiphelp.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.ForRelationshipHelp.com</a></p><p><strong>PODCAST: </strong><a href="http://www.saveyoursanitypodcast.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">http://www.SaveYourSanityPodcast.com</a></p><p><strong>FACEBOOK: </strong><a href="https://www.facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.Facebook.com/RelationshipHelpDoctor</a></p><p><strong>TWITTER: </strong><a href="https://www.twitter.com/RhobertaShaler" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.Twitter.com/RhobertaShaler</a></p><p><strong>LINKEDIN: </strong><a href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/RhobertaShaler" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.LinkedIn.com/in/RhobertaShaler</a></p><p><strong>INSTAGRAM: </strong><a href="https://www.instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.Instagram.com/DrRhobertaShaler</a></p><p><strong>PINTEREST: </strong><a href="https://www.pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.Pinterest.com/RhobertaShaler</a></p><br><p><strong>YOUTUBE</strong>: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/ForRelationshipHelp</a></p><p>-------------------------------------------------------------</p><p><strong>I'M HERE TO HELP YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT'S GOING ON AND WHAT YOU WANT TO DO ABOUT IT!</strong></p><p>If you want to learn more, share, ask questions, and feel more powerful within yourself and your relationships,</p><p><strong>join my Support Circle now.</strong></p><p>Off social media, safe discussion + videos + articles + webinars + personal home study program + group Saturday Support Calls with me.</p><p>WOW! Join now. <a href="http://relationshiphelpcircles.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Dr. Shaler's Support Circle.</a> Save $24 on your first three months.</p><p>----------------------------------------------------------------------</p><p>#traumabonding #traumabonds #addictedtoabuse #addictedtotoxicrelationship #stopthecrazymaking #howtraumabonds #signsoftrumabonding #intensityisnotintimacy </p><p>#savemysanity #saveyoursanity #relationshipadvice #tipsforrelationships #Hijackals #toxicpeople #mentalhealthmatters #MHNRNetwork #RhobertaShaler #narcissists #borderlines #antisocial #difficultpeople #emotionalabuse #verbalabuse #stopemotionalgabuse #toxicrelationships #manipulation #walkingoneggshells #mentalhealth #emotionalhealth #abuse #narcissisticabuse #boundaries #personalitydisorder #difficultpeople #antisocialbehavior #lackingempathy #journorequest #prrequest </p><p>Support this show <a target="_blank" rel="payment" href="http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist">http://supporter.acast.com/hijackals-conflict-toxic-people-narcissist</a>.</p><br><hr><p style="color:grey;font-size:0.75em;"> See <a style="color:grey;" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer" href="https://acast.com/privacy">acast.com/privacy</a> for privacy and opt-out information.</p>