The Boundless Show
Summary: Life is challenging for Christian singles. How do you balance work and personal life? How do you own your faith? How can you date with a purpose? And prepare for marriage? All while honoring God through it all? Hit up The Boundless Show, a Christian podcast for young adults, for some good, honest conversation. The young adult years are full of possibility and choices that shape who you become. Join host Lisa Anderson to discuss the highs and lows, lean on each other, and trust God in this important season of adulthood.
Advice for marrying in your 30s, plus part two of a dating Q&A with Jonathan Pokluda, and maximizing your engagement season. Featured musical artist: Nathan Tasker ( http://www.nathantasker.com/ ) Roundtable: Marriage Challenges For 30-Somethings Marrying in your 30s gives you the benefits of a little more life experience, stability and (hopefully) maturity. But it also comes with unique challenges. You’ve become more settled in your ways, you’ve accumulated some baggage, and you’re maybe a bit more cynical. Nate and Melinda recently married in their 30s and did the hard work of addressing some of their individual issues before tying the knot. Dr. Trent Langhofer counseled them individually as well as together to help give their marriage the healthiest start possible. All three join us this week to share their journey. Culture: Dating Q&A With Jonathan Pokluda (Part 2) After years of working with young adults, Pastor Jonathan (JP) Pokluda has fielded just about every dating question you could imagine. He joins us to answer even more, and this time they’re your questions — asked by live audience members and submitted on social media. In part two this week, JP answers questions about reaching the commitment stage of a relationship, how to know if a guy is truly interested in you, and the worst dating advice he’s ever heard. Get the book: "Outdated" for your donation of any amount:: https://donate.focusonthefamily.com/don-boundless-2022-06-30?refcd=1436602 Inbox: Making the Most of Engagement She’s recently engaged and is wondering how to maximize this season. What are the best ways to prepare for marriage? What should she and her fiance keep in mind? Besides doing premarital counseling, should they read a book, set some goals, focus on certain conversations — or all of the above? Counselor Glenn Lutjens weighs in. Get the book: "How We Love": https://store.focusonthefamily.com/how-we-love/?refcd=1436602
Managing Money Despite Inflation: Episode 752 Featured musical artist: Aaron Shust ( https://www.aaronshust.com/ ) Tips for fighting inflation, plus part one of a dating Q&A with Jonathan Pokluda, and having boundaries with opposite-sex friends. Roundtable: Don’t Let Inflation Get You Down Inflation is hitting all of our wallets. From higher gas prices to the cost of groceries and travel, it seems like everything is getting more expensive. How do we cope? We share money-saving tips, corners we’re cutting, and investment opportunities we’re exploring for the future. We also admit what we’re not willing to let go. Join us for this fun yet practical conversation! Culture: Dating Q&A With Jonathan Pokluda (Part 1) After years of working with young adults, Pastor Jonathan (JP) Pokluda has fielded just about every dating question you could imagine. He joins us to answer even more, and this time they’re your questions — asked by live audience members and submitted on social media. In part one this week, JP tackles questions about crushing on a coworker, not having time to date, and how to handle it when someone doesn’t text you back. Receive the Book "Outdated: Find Love That Lasts When Dating Has Changed" for your donation of any amount: https://donate.focusonthefamily.com/don-boundless-2022-06-30?refcd=1433102 Inbox: Boundaries With Opposite-Sex Friends While having friends of the opposite gender is great, it’s important to have good boundaries to avoid confusion, false intimacy, and the dreaded “friendlationship.” The question is, which boundaries are recommended? Counselor Jenny Coffey weighs in.
Insider tips to express romantic interest, plus evangelism for everyday people, and when you struggle to make friends at church. Featured musical artist: Mosaic MSC ( https://mosaic.org/MSC ) Roundtable: How Do I Know If They’re Interested? Men and women are very different, including how we express romantic interest. This can lead to miscommunication, assumptions or long periods of wishing and wondering where you stand. Our guests share the many missteps they’ve taken in pursuing, wooing and (dare we say it?) flirting with the opposite sex, and what they learned from those experiences. They’ll also break down what works and what doesn’t when it comes to making a move, and what makes a person stand out from the crowd. Culture: Sharing Your Faith in Simple Ways “People don’t care what you know until they know that you care.” This principle also applies to how you share your faith, because without a relationship, your attempts at evangelism can only go so far. Pastor Jay Benson and Jill Hill are both passionate about sharing Jesus in their communities and friend circles, and they have many stories of how they’ve invited non-Christians into their everyday lives. They’ll also share simple and effective ideas for engaging our neighbors, coworkers and others who need the gospel. Inbox: Time to Find a New Church? She’s been going to the same church for five years but still doesn’t feel connected. Her schedule is also very busy, so socializing outside of work hours is not an easy thing. Is it time to find a new church or stick it out and hope to make friends? Our friend Josh Zeichik weighs in.
Letting go of what others think of you, plus Nick Hall’s modern vision for evangelism, and is it too early to define the relationship? Featured musical artist: Danen Kane ( https://danenkane.com/home ) Roundtable: Don’t Be a Slave to Others’ Opinions We’ve all been guilty of walking into a room and immediately wondering what everyone thinks of us. But truth be told, most people aren’t thinking about us — they’re thinking about themselves. How can we live confidently without constantly worrying about others’ good opinion? Our guests share their own struggles in this area and give helpful ways to be aware of how we are viewed by others without being ruled by it. Culture: An Evangelism Woodstock In 1972, a massive event called Explo ‘72 took place in Dallas, Texas. Thousands of young adults gathered from all over the country and were inspired and equipped to take the gospel of Jesus Christ into their communities and around the world. On this year’s 50th anniversary of Explo ‘72, evangelist Nick Hall is hosting a 21st-century version of that historic gathering. Called Together ‘22, this free event will take place at Cotton Bowl stadium in Dallas on June 24-25. Nick joins us to talk about how sharing the gospel in 2022 is both similar to and different from how it was done 50 years ago. What are the unique challenges and opportunities he sees today? Join us for this exciting conversation and details on this once-in-a-lifetime event. Sign up for Together ‘22 ( https://together22.pulse.org/ ) Inbox: Defining the Relationship Already? She’s been going on dates with the same guy for eight weeks, but neither of them has defined their relationship. Is it time for her to say something, or should she wait for him to take initiative and speak up? Our host Lisa Anderson weighs in. Article: Whose Job Is It to Define the Relationship? ( https://www.boundless.org/blog/whose-job-is-it-to-define-the-relationship/ )
How family affects us, plus what happens if Roe v. Wade is overturned, and should you have contact with an ex? Featured musical artist: Ginny Owens ( https://ginnyowens.com/ ) Roundtable: How Your Family of Origin Affected You (Part 2) Like it or not, we’ve all picked up patterns and proclivities from our family of origin. For some, what we learned was relatively good. For others, talking about our family background is painful. Our guests share the good, bad and ugly attitudes and habits they adopted from their families, as well as the lessons they’ve learned and the cycles they’ve broken by growing and changing. In part two this week, our panelists discuss where they are now in relation to their families as well as the lingering effects of their family systems. Culture: Abortion Laws in America & See Life 2022 Since the recent leak of the draft opinion from the Dobbs vs. Jackson Women’s Health Organization Supreme Court case, many Americans anticipate the possible reversal of Roe vs. Wade. If that happens, what are the legal implications? John Stonestreet and Robyn Chambers give us a primer on the ins and outs of this historic decision. They’ll detail what we can expect, how we can pray, and will encourage us to value life not just through legislation but in everyday opportunities. We’ll also talk about the exciting See Life 2022 scheduled for June 14, 2022. Register for See Life 2022 Livestream: ( https://www.focusonthefamily.com/seelife22/ ) Get the book "A Practical Guide to Culture" for your donation of any amount: https://donate.focusonthefamily.com/don-boundless-2022-06-09?refcd=1422602 Inbox: No Contact After a Breakup? Is it wise to have any contact with an ex after a breakup? Some say “absolutely no contact” while others recommend giving it a certain amount of time before you reach out. Our host Lisa Anderson weighs in.
How family affects us, plus blessing others with your words, and when you’re more introverted than the person you’re dating. Featured musical artist: James Peden ( https://www.jamespedenmusic.com/ ) Roundtable: How Your Family of Origin Affected You (Part 1) Like it or not, we’ve all picked up patterns and proclivities from our family of origin. For some, what we learned was relatively good. For others, talking about our family background is painful. Our guests share the good, bad and ugly attitudes and habits they adopted from their families, as well as the lessons they’ve learned and the cycles they’ve broken by growing and changing. In part one this week, they tell their stories and share their observations about what was healthy and unhealthy in their childhood homes and relationships. Culture: Using Words to Bless Others The book of Proverbs says that “a word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver.” Knowing what to say when is a mark of a mature person as well as a mature Christian. Whether an encouragement, a rebuke, or a word of instruction, we’ve all been on the receiving end of words we needed to hear. Authors Cheryl Marshall and Caroline Newheiser have navigated many necessary conversations. They discuss insights from their book “When Words Matter Most” and help us discover ways to use words in different situations to bring blessing and healing. Get the book "When Words Matter Most" for your donation of any amount: https://donate.focusonthefamily.com/don-boundless-2022-06-02?refcd=1422601 Inbox: Do They Have to Go Out So Often? She’s seeing a guy, but he’s more extroverted than she is, and he often wants to be together and on the go. Is it OK to express her desire to go out only once a week, or is that not enough for a sustainable dating relationship? A pastor and young adults mentor weighs in.
When women make more money than men, plus advice for difficult relationships, and does a physical disability hurt your dating chances? Featured musical artist: Ellie Holcomb ( https://www.ellieholcomb.com/ ) Roundtable: When Women Make More Money Than Men Studies show that in many cases, women now outpace men in education and in the workplace. What are the implications? In an age where career and calling are so important, does money play a part? Many Christians are uncomfortable with the conversation about salaries and earning power, especially in a dating relationship or when thinking about a future marriage and family. Our guests discuss their experience with this topic, including biblical wisdom and common sense for addressing it in their own lives. Culture: Dealing With Difficult People It’s easy to assume that we should never have conflict with fellow Christians. But such an approach to relationships is unbiblical — even dangerous — and can prevent us from leveraging growth opportunities. Pastor Brian Noble admittedly struggled with this until he realized that not facing conflict produced a harvest of contention in the long run. Now the CEO of Peacemaker Ministries, Brian shares how he’s learned to deal with difficult people in varied situations, and why handling conflict healthily sets you up for relational success. Get the book "'Living Reconciled" for your donation of any amount: https://donate.focusonthefamily.com/don-boundless-2022-05-26?refcd=1414402 Inbox: Dating With a Disability She’s interested in getting to know a guy, but feels limited by her physical disability. How much will this impact her ability to date? Counselor Joannie DeBrito weighs in with encouragement and advice.
Our best wedding planning strategies, plus God and technology, and when your friend can’t seem to break up with her boyfriend. Featured musical artist: Liz Vice ( https://www.lizvice.com/ ) Roundtable: Insider Wedding Tips Wedding season is officially in full swing, but planning the big day takes a lot of work. Between choosing the right dress, sending invitations, booking a DJ and finding a venue, the stress can be overwhelming. To help sort through the madness, we invited newlyweds to share their best tips for planning a wedding, including prioritizing their wish lists, navigating timing issues, and managing others’ expectations. They also share their “must-haves” for a meaningful wedding day. Culture: What’s God’s Opinion on Technology? With technology seemingly taking over the world today, it’s fair to ask, “How does God feel about all of this?” Desiring God’s Tony Reinke co-hosts the “Ask Pastor John” podcast with John Piper, and joins us this week to share a biblically-balanced approach on everything from smartphones to cryptocurrency to space travel. He’ll answer questions including: What’s God’s relationship with technology? What are technology’s limitations? How can we use tech for God’s glory? Get the book "God, Technology, and the Christian Life" for your donation of any amount: https://donate.focusonthefamily.com/don-boundless-2022-05-19?refcd=1414102 Inbox: Breaking Up Is Hard to Do Her best friend is in an unhealthy dating relationship and has expressed a desire to break it off, but it seems like nothing is changing. Is it time for our listener to speak up? Counselor Jenny Coffey weighs in.
The “children/no children” conversation, plus navigating death with a loved one, and when you and your friend like the same person. Featured musical artist: About a Mile ( https://www.facebook.com/aboutamile ) Receive the book "The Value of Wrinkles: A Young Perspective on How Loving the Old Will Change Your Life" for your donation of any amount: https://donate.focusonthefamily.com/don-boundless-2022-05-12?refcd=1414304 Roundtable: Let’s Talk About Having Kids When dating someone and considering marriage, it’s common to eventually ask: Do you want children? Obviously, it’s a big decision that should be discussed before tying the knot. But what if the two of you disagree on the subject? What if one is undecided, or you both have different opinions on timing, number of kids, or something else? Is the “kids” convo a dealbreaker? Our guests talk through this tricky issue with grace and wisdom for us all. Culture: Death and Dying Helping a friend or loved one navigate the dying process — whether in old age, sickness or tragedy — is one of the most challenging things you will ever do. At the same time, it is also a journey filled with meaningful moments. Dr. Margaret Cottle and Dr. Bill Toffler are physicians specializing in end of life issues. They’ll share helpful perspectives on how to cope when you receive hard news, how to support someone who is dying, how to walk through grief, and how to embrace caregiving and be a support to other caregivers. They also share a biblical perspective on assisted suicide. Article by Lisa: My Mom Is Killing Me ( https://www.boundless.org/blog/my-mom-is-killing-me/ ) Inbox: When Your Friend Likes the Same Guy She’s liked a guy for a while but didn’t tell anyone, and now one of her friends happens to like him too. What should she do — confess her feelings for this man, or wait and see what happens? Counselor Jenny Coffey weighs in.
Men overcoming low self-esteem, plus a Q&A with pastor Jonathan Pitts on grief, and should you change churches when dating? Featured musical artist: Jonathan Cain ( https://jonathancain.org/ ) Roundtable: Low Self-Esteem in Men When you’re one click away from seeing the highlight reels of your friends' lives, it’s easy to think you’re not as important or special as anyone else. Or maybe you’ve thought that since childhood; old wounds don’t always heal, do they? Hurtful experiences, poor relationships and false comparisons can drag us into the pit of low self-esteem. Is there a way to protect yourself and even overcome the lies? In part two of our series on low self-esteem, we’ll ask a group of men what brings them down, and more importantly, what it looks like to turn things around by understanding our limitations and embracing our identity in Christ. Culture: Surviving Grief and Loss (Part 2) When Jonathan Pitts and his wife, Wynter, celebrated their 15th wedding anniversary, they had much to look forward to, including writing books and doing ministry together. But less than a month later, Wynter died suddenly at age 38. Her passing sent Jonathan and their four daughters into a tailspin. But through that difficult season, Jonathan saw God’s faithfulness. In part two of our conversation, he’ll answer your questions on grief and loss. Get the book "My Wynter Season: Seeing God’s Faithfulness in the Shadow of Grief" here: ( https://donate.focusonthefamily.com/don-boundless-2022-04-28?refcd=1410406 ) Inbox: Dating Someone From Another Church If you start dating someone who attends another church, should you leave your own congregation to join theirs? Lisa Anderson weighs in.
Women overcoming low self-esteem, plus pastor Jonathan Pitts on grief, and how do you share your opinions humbly? Featured musical artist: Love and the Outcome ( https://loveandtheoutcome.com/ ) Roundtable: Low Self-Esteem in Women When you’re one click away from seeing the highlight reels of your friends' lives, it’s easy to think you’re not as important or special as anyone else. Or maybe you’ve thought that since childhood; old wounds don’t always heal, do they? Hurtful experiences, poor relationships and false comparisons can drag us into the pit of low self-esteem. Is there a way to protect yourself and even overcome the lies? In part one of a two-part series on low self-esteem (men, you’re next week!), we’ll ask a group of women what brings them down, and more importantly, what it looks like to turn things around by understanding our limitations and embracing our identity in Christ. Culture: Surviving Grief and Loss (Part 1) When Jonathan Pitts and his wife, Wynter, celebrated their 15th wedding anniversary, they had much to look forward to, including writing books and doing ministry together. But less than a month later, Wynter died suddenly at age 38. Her passing sent Jonathan and their four daughters into a tailspin. But through that difficult season, Jonathan saw God’s faithfulness. In part one of our conversation, he shares the impact of grief and how God can sustain us in unexpected ways Inbox: How Can I Share My Opinion? Whenever she gives her thoughts on a matter, people push back. How can she speak up and give her opinion with kindness and humility? Counselor Tim Sanford weighs in. That's Just My Opinion: ( https://www.boundless.org/blog/thats-just-my-opinion/ ) Link to Counseling Services ( https://www.focusonthefamily.com/get-help/counseling-services-and-referrals/?refcd=1349703 )
How to set boundaries and say “no,” plus the pros and cons of marrying young, and where to turn when it feels like your life has stalled. Featured musical artist: Audio Adrenaline ( https://www.facebook.com/audioadrenaline/ ) Roundtable: It’s OK to Say “No” Your friend invited you to a party, your church is asking you to volunteer, and you’re thinking about joining a new small group. While opportunities in life are endless, saying “yes” to all of them is a recipe for burnout. Sometimes it’s best to decline, even when the opportunities are good ones. Our guests describe how they’ve struggled with setting boundaries in life, and why doing so is important. Culture: Better to Marry Earlier or Later? Many of us think that before getting married, we need to have our lives, careers and finances in order. But research shows this is not always the best approach. Dr. Jason Carroll is a respected professor and researcher who co-authored a study on the pros and cons of marrying young. In this thought-provoking discussion, he shares what the study shows about timelines and milestones for tying the knot. Inbox: Getting Your Life Back on Track She took care of her mom who was struggling with serious health issues. But she feels this necessary “detour” got her stuck, and now she’s discouraged and wondering how to get her life back on track. Where should she start? Counselor George Stahnke offers a word of encouragement.
Repenting for real, plus signs of a healthy dating relationship, and should you leave a church over theological differences? Featured musical artist: David Dunn ( http://www.daviddunnmusic.com/ ) Roundtable: Signs of True Repentance (Part 2) Repentance is an important part of the Christian life, and because we’re all sinners, we should be experts at repenting, right? The truth is, living in genuine repentance is harder than you think. Pastor Mark Bates and professional counselor Tim Sanford talk about how to recognize true repentance in ourselves and others. In part two of our discussion, they address whether ministry leaders can be reinstated after showing repentance, choosing to forgive someone who has sinned against you, and finding victory over strongholds. Counseling Consultation and Referrals: ( https://www.focusonthefamily.com/get-help/counseling-services-and-referrals/ ) Culture: Are You Dating the Right Person? As a mentor mom who loves seeing God write young adults’ love stories, Rhonda Stoppe has a lot of real-world dating advice. In this thought-provoking discussion, she shares some vital tips for knowing if the person you’re dating is someone you should marry. She’ll address the topics of kindness, purity, evaluating your motives and more. Donate a gift of any amount to Boundless and you’ll receive "Real-Life Romance: Inspiring Stories to Help You Believe in True Love" by Rhonda Stoppe. 10 Christian Dating Advice Tips to Pursue a Godly Relationship: ( https://www.crosswalk.com/family/singles/godly-relationship-advice-tips-to-know-before-you-date.html ) Inbox: Questioning a Church Leader’s Theology She recently broke up with her boyfriend after learning that he and his family believe in “open theism.” Since his dad is a church leader, she’s now questioning whether or not it’s time to leave the church they all attend. Pastor Mark Bates addresses the problematic nature of theological differences and what to do when you’re torn about leaving a church you love.
Repenting for real, plus hope for women struggling with sexual sin, and should you date someone with a criminal record? Featured musical artist: Austin Stone Worship ( https://www.austinstoneworship.com/ ) Roundtable: Signs of True Repentance (Part 1) Repentance is an important part of the Christian life, and because we’re all sinners, we should be experts at repenting, right? The truth is, living in genuine repentance is harder than you think. Pastor Mark Bates and professional counselor Tim Sanford talk about how to recognize true repentance in ourselves and others. In part one of our discussion, they define repentance, explain the difference between sinning and struggling, and offer hope to those caught in cycles of sin. Counseling consultation and referrals: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/get-help/counseling-services-and-referrals/ Steps for Breaking Pornography Addiction article: https://www.boundless.org/adulthood/practical-steps-for-breaking-pornography-addiction/ and Putting Away Porn For Good article: https://www.boundless.org/adulthood/sexuality/putting-porn-away-for-good/ Inbox: Dating Someone With a Criminal Record She met a guy at church, but is concerned about his past as a convicted sex offender. It happened before he became a Christian, but should this be a disqualifier for dating him? Counselor Yale Kushner balances God’s grace with the practical implications of this man’s felony record.
Part two of a Q&A with the Boundless team, plus questions about practicing humility, and should she be friends with an ex-boyfriend? Featured musical artist: Vertical Worship ( https://www.verticalofficial.com/ ) Roundtable: The Boundless Team Answers Your Questions (Part 2) Our team got together to answer questions sent in by you, our listeners. The questions range from what’s on our current playlists to favorite places to travel, dating advice, getting through a difficult season of life and more. Hear part two of our discussion with Lisa, Hannah and John. Culture: What Is True Humility? (Part 2) We’re all convinced we’re humble enough. It’s everyone else who needs to work on being less prideful, right? But what’s the definition of humility, and what does it look like in everyday life? Pastor David Mathis from Desiring God uses biblical examples to address what it means to be humbled by God, how to humble yourself, and what we can learn about humility from the life of Jesus. In part two, he answers listener questions. Get the book "Humbled: Welcoming the Uncomfortable Work of God" here: ( https://donate.focusonthefamily.com/don-boundless-2022-03-24?refcd=1337402 ) Inbox: Letting an Ex-Boyfriend Back In A guy broke up with her because he felt he could never live up to her standards of moral purity. Now he wants to be friends again. Is it wise to let him back in her life? Counselor Wendy Brown weighs in.