Foster Parenting Podcast

We had a big court date today. We’ve been quite worried about it for the last several days. There was good news and bad news. The bad news was that the hearing was postponed. The good news was that it was postponed so that we could meet Carmen with a mediator and work out post-adoption visitations. If we can come to an agreement we’ll be adopting Andrea and Linda! We’re not quite at the finish line yet, but we’re getting really close. This was fantastic news. We make sure to fill everyone in on the insides and outsides of a family services courtroom. For anyone who really cares. We start off talking about an 80’s song by Til Tuesday. You can see the video here. (which we found for free).  Tim is a little disappointed that he didn’t already know it was an Aimee Mann song.

Andrea and Linda had a visit with their grandfather. The visit went great but the aftermath was not so great. Also Wendy left town for 3.5 days, find out how Tim did with them on his own once more. In this episode we offer our ideas on how to more easily get placed with kids. If you’re having a hard time getting kids placed in your home this episode just for you.

An update on Baby Janelle and our lives in general. We also review the National Foster Care Adoption Attitudes Survey produced by the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption. What are the common misconceptions Americans have about adoption and foster care? Tim also does an excellent job of sticking his foot in his mouth and alienating his relatives. Watch how he climbs out of the mess he makes for himself.

So it turns out it’s true. It’s a crazy system. This episode presents more questions than answers, for us at least. It turns out that we may be having a baby! Within the next couple of days we’ll find out if Andrea and Linda’s sister, Janelle, will be joining us. We discuss our decision making process for what was a tough call for us. Also Andrea and Linda had a visit with their grandfather that didn’t go the way we hoped.

We had a really pleasant week which included a trip the the Emergency Room and a lot of displays of flat out anger and aggression in our girls. To top it off, they’ve learned the “F” word. We give a shout out to Jana Alayra, the Children’s Worship Leader who taught our girls how to cuss (It wasn’t really her fault). Jana, if you’re out there we need you to come teach a couple of preschoolers what the real lyrics are. An update on our court date and what we can expect next. We also start a new feature called “Listener’s Corner”. Wait till you hear the jingle.

We’re back after a long delay. We’re finally in our new place and facing new struggles as a result. We’ve got some funny stories to share as well We mention De Facto Parenting status in this episode. Here’s a link that discusses it further. What is a De Facto Parent?

W is alone again and takes the opportunity to talk candidly about motherhood. Andrea and Linda still have visits with their birth mother. So how does it feel to be the “other” mommy? Also discussed: Visits with biological parents Our next court date The desire for biological children

Here are some special considerations when you move with foster children. Moving is stressful, but you can ease the transition with some planning and TLC. Also discussed: Should 3-year-olds be watching The Wizard of Oz? More tips on moving with children: How to Make It Easier For Them 10 Tips for Relocating with Kids

This episode is about being grateful and gratitude. It’s also about how you won’t hear those expressions from foster kids. We mentioned these other websites: An article by Carrie Craft The Project Management Podcast by Cornelius Fichtner Why Children May Not Want To Talk About Adoption

We try to make our best case for why you should adopt through foster care. We start out with some fundamentals that influence our thinking and then list our 8 best reasons to adopt through the foster care system. There is plenty of data about the harmful effects orphanages have on children. Here is one of many links. http://www.nacac.org/policy/orphanages.html A family is always better than an institution.

Our brief experience fostering teenage girls is discussed in all of its glory. We didn’t have a positive experience but we still think it’s a great idea to foster teenagers. Hopefully someone can learn from our experience (most of all us). We should also be clear, as always, that Michael, Beth and Clare are not their real names.

In this episode we respond to some listener feedback and answer how we think you should go about choosing the right agency. In this episode we talk about: Foster vs. Fost/adopt Returning your Calls Location Shared Values Other Foster Parents and much more

We talk about what we’ve done right or “the shortest episode ever.” In this episode we talk about: The Snack Bin Don’t buy into the chaos Animals and attachment The Picture Wall Clearing our schedules

We use Love and Logic, a parenting approach that – you guessed it – emphasizes two things: love and logic. In this episode we talk about: Parenting With Love And Logic. Buy the book! The basics of Love and Logic: choices, consequences and empathy Why Love and Logic is effective with foster children Examples from our experiences with kids, ages 3 to 18

Wendy’s back behind the microphone, so no shenanigans this week. In this episode we talk about: The difficulties the girls had while Wendy was away The difference between discipline and punishment Can you spank foster kids? The difficulties we have making the girls sit through a time-out