Summary: <a href="http://therecoveryshow.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/02/DSC_4699.jpg"></a>Why did I come to Al-Anon when I did? Or, to ask it a different way, why didn’t I come sooner? What made me ready?<br> Why did I come to Al-Anon when I did? Or, why didn’t I come sooner?<br> <br> * Not understanding alcoholism.<br> <br> * I didn’t grow up with alcoholism<br> * I thought my loved one’s behavior was a choice<br> * So she just had to fix it.<br> <br> <br> * Denying the problem.<br> <br> * It was her problem.<br> * Not mine.<br> * She just needed to “drink normally.”<br> <br> <br> * Not seeing the problem.<br> <br> * My behavior was out of control.<br> * But I couldn’t see that.<br> * I didn’t connect my behavior to the alcoholism<br> <br> <br> * Resistance<br> <br> * Therapists at treatment centers suggested it to me.<br> * “Not my problem”<br> * 12 steps were off-putting<br> * I’m FINE<br> * Not relating to the video on codependency<br> <br> <br> * Shame and isolation<br> * So, what happened?<br> * A “moment of clarity”<br> <br> * Yet another “friends and family day” at yet another treatment center.<br> * “YOU didn’t cause it, YOU can’t cure it, YOU can’t control it.”<br> * Recognizing that it was NOT mine to fix.<br> * Recognizing that I was miserable.<br> * The “<a href="https://al-anon.org/newcomers/self-quiz/adult-quiz/">20 questions</a>”<br> <br> * There are also questions for “<a href="https://al-anon.org/newcomers/self-quiz/adult-grew-up-with-alcoholic-quiz/">adult children</a>” and <a href="https://al-anon.org/newcomers/self-quiz/adult-quiz/">teens</a>.<br> <br> <br> <br> <br> * The “last resort”<br> <br> * What else is there? What can it hurt to try it? (Al-Anon)<br> * Even then, I resisted. When a friend offered to take me to a meeting that night, I said “I need to think about it.”<br> * I thought about it for maybe 30 seconds.<br> <br> <br> * Did I get here “right on time”?<br> <br> * I’m glad I didn’t take longer to get here, anyway.<br> <br> <br> <br> Upcoming topics include Alateen, slogans, and parenting. Please call us at 734-707-8795 or email <a title="Send us mail" href="mailto:feedback@therecoveryshow.com">feedback@therecoveryshow.com</a> with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.<br> In this episode, I mentioned the <a href="/2016/03/intimacy-panel-feb-2016/">Intimacy open talks</a> from last year.<br> Several listeners wrote in about Steve L's talk on fear, faith, and surrender. One asked if there are other talks by him available. I found his talk on the Recovery Radio Network, where there are <a href="http://recoveryradionetwork.podcastpeople.com/posts/search?q=steve+l">other talks by people named Steve L</a>. (But I haven't listened to them to know if they are the by the same person.)<br>
