Summary: I don’t even know what to say after this morning’s parenting edition of The Truth Box. There have been a LOT of strong emotions flying around, and a lot of things said. According to some of you, I crossed a serious line posting some of those confessions. Others of you have demanded that I report the submitters to the police, threatening that if I don’t, you will. Others have demanded that some of the children need to be taken away from their parents. When I shared the link this morning, I told you all that it was my favorite edition of The Truth Box yet. And I stand by that. We had never done a parental confessions edition, and something about it all made me feel so much more empowered and emboldened as a parent while I put it together. Many of the confessions were light-hearted. Some even humorous. And some were extremely heavy and hard to hear. That, to me, is what makes The Truth Box so powerful. But right now let’s talk about a couple of the heavier ones. This one has really struck a nerve with people: The embarrassing thing I did as a parent: I’ve lost control of my temper and hurt my son more than once, even when he was a baby. Why I’ve never told anyone: I’m afraid he would get taken away. And I really love him, even though he does everything possible to push my buttons all the time. And this one: The embarrassing thing I did as a parent: Left my 8 year old daughter alone at night after she fell asleep so I could go to the bar for some me time for a couple of hours. Why I’ve never told anyone: Because it’s dangerous and I could get into a lot of trouble! There were others that pushed readers’ buttons, and believe me. I understand why. But to respond and attack the confessors? I fear that the reason for the Truth Box is becoming hard to remember at all. The Truth Box is a place where people can come and share a secret that they’ve been holding onto and share it anonymously. I don’t collect any information about the sender, not even their IP address. I have no way to tie any of these to anyone. I also am a big time advocate for good parenting. I’m an advocate for involved parenting. I’m definitely an advocate for controlled and non-abusive parenting. Which is why I loved this version of the Truth Box. Every person who shared a secret, big or small, had been holding onto that secret for God knows how long. Many of them felt like their secrets defined them as parents. Many of them felt that their secrets often meant that deep down they were bad parents, and were scared shitless at the thought of others finding out the truth. Yet they posted anyway because they needed to say the words out loud, even if anonymously. They needed to admit what they had done, even if anonymously. They knew that others might respond harshly, and they did it anyway. And then we go open our big mouths and crucify them and want to take their children away? CONTINUED ON NEXT PAGE CONTINUED FROM PREVIOUS PAGE Hm. Doesn’t seem like that is going to help anything. Seems like that is going to push them harder and deeper into whatever is haunting them and into whatever it is that pushed their actions in the first place. I read the vicious comments and I only think, God. Those people will never feel empowered, they will never get better, they will never improve. And neither will any of the parents reading it who struggle with the same things. Not if this is the way we respond. Don’t we get it? When we attack others, and judge others, and demand extreme measures when we find out their secrets, it keeps EVERYONE fearful of what will happen to them if they ever acknowledge their own shortcomings as parents. Listen to these words again: #10 - “I’ve lost control of my temper and hurt my son more than once, even when he was a baby.” Now, listen to these two responses and tell me which one is going to invoke a spirit of change and improvement.
