Sex For Smart People* show

Sex For Smart People*

Summary: Sex For Smart People (That Means You!) is a new podcast by us (Stephanie and Dave!). We think that authenticity and communication are the sexiest. We were partners (like sexy partners!) for six years. While we were partners — and also now that we are not — we created our own vocabulary around our connection, in such a way that inspires friends and friends of friends and people we don’t even know come to us all the time for relationship and sex advice. OK, so, we think that advice is sort of silly, since what the hell does any human really know about what’s good for another human anyway? But we are both fiercely dedicated to the expanding conversation around love and sex and families in America, and adding noise to the throng of folks who celebrate the idea that we are allowed to think about alternatives (sexy alternatives!). So we’ve decided that it’s about goddamn time to formalize our ideas and apparent advice-giving skills.

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  • Artist: Sex For Smart People
  • Copyright: © 2013 Sex For Smart People

Podcasts:

 Episode 8 – Empathy is the Sexiest | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 1:22:54

Drumroll, please… religion, racism, AND pronoun usage!! LGBTQ rights organizer/researcher Cole Parke, who embodies empathy so fully it is practically a superpower, joins us to share about their experience organizing between queer communities and communities of faith, and also about how they work against hate and violence toward LGBTQ people in Uganda, Russia, and elsewhere. We collectively address a listener question about reconciling being gay and being Christian, and we share experiences of learning and admitting weve been wrong andamp; the beauty of shutting the fuck up and listening. Is it really possible to hold others in love when they have conflicting or even oppressive views toward us? And if someone you are dating holds some racist views, is that a dealbreaker? Stephanie and Dave share their thoughts on Valentines Day. Learn why Jesus likes it rough, and glitter is the herpes of the craft world! This is a long one, but a really really good one, we promise.

 Episode 7 – Relationships Are Something You Do, Not Something You Have | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 1:01:06

Sex therapist/psychoanalyst Dr. Michael Aaron is our guest of honor this time. Hear his and our perspectives on things like: What to do when you feel less ravenous about sex than your partner feels? Is it really honestly possible to feel coziness/familiarity and also sexiness/mystery/excitement in a long term partnership? How do you begin to talk to your partner about your interest in power play? (Trigger warning, around the half hour mark, we talk explicitly about rape fantasies.) And did you know that *just this past year*, kinky behavior was officially de-pathologized in clinical psychology terms (we think it is about fucking time)? Plus, Dave is super silly and loopy on NyQuil, and he and Stephanie share their favorite pick-up lines.

 Episode 6 – The Talking-to-Cute-Strangers New Year’s Jamboree! | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 0:00

[audio mp3=http://www.thepodcasthost.com/sexforsmartpeople/wp-content/uploads/sites/69/2014/01/SFSP-Ep-6-v2.mp3][/audio] Happy 2014! Meet the fabulous sex columnist Twanna Hines, of funkybrownchick.com. We discuss the line between fun flirtation and creepiness, we celebrate the beauty of human connection[audio mp3=http://www.thepodcasthost.com/sexforsmartpeople/wp-content/uploads/sites/69/2014/01/SFSP-Ep-6-v2.mp3][/audio] in general, and we talk about the distinction between open relationships and cheating (spoiler: its all about the honesty and communication). Also: role play! There is an actual role play in this one. And Dave and Stephanie check in about the podcasts mission statement, we share some resources for healing sexual trauma, Dave rants about why Love, Actually may be the least romantic film ever made, and Twanna talks about menstruation! Oh yes.

 Episode 6 – The Talking-to-Cute-Strangers New Year’s Jamboree! | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 1:00:28

Happy 2014! Meet the fabulous sex columnist Twanna Hines, of funkybrownchick.com. We discuss the line between fun flirtation and creepiness, we celebrate the beauty of human connection in general, and we talk about the distinction between open relationships and cheating (spoiler: its all about the honesty and communication). Also: role play! There is an actual role play in this one. And Dave and Stephanie check in about the podcasts mission statement, we share some resources for healing sexual trauma, Dave rants about why Love, Actually may be the least romantic film ever made, and Twanna talks about menstruation! Oh yes.

 Episode 5 – Are Personal Choices Inherently Political? | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 1:02:42

We are joined by super wise professor/researcher Laura Portwood-Stacer to discuss the complexity of the idea of the personal as the political, including some unpacking of the hefty concepts of heteronormativity and sex positivity. Wheres the line between a political identity that you should be out about and a bedroom practice that you should be discreet about? Is it ever ok for a woman to choose not to come in the context of a casual hook-up, or is that letting guys off the hook? And if a woman who is attracted to women is in her early thirties and has not yet had sex with a woman, has she completely missed the boat? Also, hear Daves extended boat metaphors, a love song from BONOBONOBONOBO, and Stephanie and Lauras Quickies about Jesus. Yes: Jesus!

 Episode 4 – 50 Shades of Safer Sex | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 1:28:04

Badass sexuality educator/activist Adjoa Tetteh joins us to discuss ways of shifting the culture around talking about safer sex, how to love your WHOLE body (even and especially when its hard), what to do if you find our your spouse has recently had unprotected sex with someone else, what the fuck is actually up with HPV, and much much more. Plus Stephanies thoughts on 50 Shades of Grey, Adjoas mad props to breast feeding, a song about pleasure during childbirth, and our very first crowd source question!

 Episode 3 – Love, as a Verb. Queer, as a Verb. We Like Verbs! | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 45:40

The vibrant/wise/internationally-acclaimed theater artist Taylor Mac is here to talk with us about loving and queering and celebrating, oh yes! Sometimes making the bed when you dont want to is an act of love. Communication does not have to be dramatic! What to do when you have been out with someone a few times but you havent heard from them in awhile.This, and much much more. Plus a tour update and song about longterm commitment from BONOBONOBONOBO.

 Episode 2 – Our Love Is What We Make of It | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 56:01

Our guest is the super epic badass, Diana Adams, who is a lawyer for non-traditional families rights and longterm activist for sexual freedom between consenting adults. Diana shares about her work in helping people create intentional partnerships and families and gives a sort of State of Sexual-Freedom-Rights Address. Questions/discussions about what to do when you want an open relationship but your partner does not, resources for buying sex toys, ways of figuring out what you are into, and going with the flow versus the potential steaminess/profundity of using words to communicate about your desires, and more. Also, tour updates and a feminist anthem from Stephanies band, BONOBONOBONOBO.

 Episode 1 – Dave and Stephanie’s Story + Launch Party Extravaganza! | File Type: audio/mpeg | Duration: 1:16:12

Hey Smart People, if you are new to this podcast, we recommend that you start here. In this episode, recorded live in front of an (amazingly sexy) audience at the Bowery Poetry Club, we share our personal stories, our mission statement and why we are passionate about doing this podcast. We also address queries from the audience about things like: keeping consent talk sexy, starting the conversation about having an open relationship, and beginning to explore the sex party scene. Plus, music performances by Salty Brine, Ian Axness, and BONOBONOBONOBO, and learn what our audience thinks is the sexiest. Our love is what we make of it, yo. Were so glad and grateful that you are in this conversation with us.

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